Twisted Darkness
by xShirochanx
Summary: Without learning how to control the hollow inside him Ichigo's world begins to crumble.
1. Chapter 1

**Yoa! This is my first fanfiction...ever...I've read a couple and I had an idea so I thought I'd give it a shot. I'm an absolute IchixRuk fan, so either they end up together in the end or he dies lonely D . Slightly kidding...anyway, sorry for the ramble. I'll try to catch all the grammar and spelling mistakes but a couple might slip past me... this is so far a one shot, but if you like it, and if I see plot for the future I'll add more chapters. w I hope that you enjoy! -Shirochan**

**Disclaimer: It's sad...I know...but I don't own Bleach.**

**Quick note: The story takes place after the Soul Society Arc (we're goin' manga so none of the bounto stuff) in the Arrancar Arc, after his first battle with GrimmJow. What would've happened if he hadn't run away to the Vizard.**

Orihime ran as fast as she could, following Ichigo's reiatsu. They were in an abandoned part of town that had been closed off because of an accidental chemical leak that had happened a long time ago. She ran down the road as it twisted this way and that, it was a big highway now completely empty of life. _Kurosaki-san...Kuchiki-san...please be alright..._She thought worriedly.

Orihime came to an abrupt halt, that road dipped down into an underground tunnel. This type of everyday thing shouldn't seem so horrible...but this was different...it didn't have any lights. The tunnel was pitch black and had an eiry feeling to it...it just felt strange...she could feel Ichigo's reiatsu seeping out, which lately had been feeling strange itself.

_Where is Kuchiki-san? She was supposed to be with Kurosaki-kun...but I don't feel her reiatsu anywhere... _Orihime felt uncomfortable. She stared into the darkness, afraid to enter. _What a creepy place to battle an Arrancar...I hope they're alright._ She felt a little guilty to be worrying about them but to afraid to check. She tried to move her feet foreward, but she couldn't.

She had only just completely healed from the last time they'd faced an Arrancar, it wasn't his fault but Ichigo seemed to be blaming himself for everything. He just wasn't him...he was having trouble paying attention to anything, he was acting strange, and his reiatsu...felt horrible... Something was definitely going on.

_Come to think of it, I don't sense the presence of Arrancar, they must have defeated it already. What if Kurosaki-kun's injured?! I need to go to him...just to make sure everythings okay...I'm sure it is..._ But in her gut she had the feeling she was wrong. Ichigo didn't want anyone to come because, as he explained, they were still healing and needed to rest. Rukia, though, wouldn't stand for his childness and forced him to let her come to help. Of course the other Shinigami would've taken care of it but that had to return to make a report or something in Soul Society...

Orihime forced herself forward into the dark abyss of the tunnel. After she was in it wasn't as dark as she thought it would be, she could still see...but then again she was still near the front. She walked slowly, nervously.

"Kurosaki-kun?" She asked as loud as she could, no answer. But she heard a sound...farther down the tunnel...what was it?

"Kuchiki-san!" She called, even though she didn't sense Rukia anywhere nearby. _They must of gotten' into an agrument or something, looks like Rukia's already gone. _She stepped on something strange, something metal. She bent down to get a closer look...it was Ichigo's zanpaktou. He had it strapped to his back all the time, and she'd seen him battle with it, but it didn't look as glorious until you saw it up close. In awe she ran her hand along the flat part of the blade. Her hand touched something wet...she drew back her hand to see what it was..._blood_. She reasoned with herself...he had been fighting an Arrancar...they have blood...

Orihime stood up, leaving the sword there. She became uneasy, now realizing that there were little puddles of blood all along the ground. Once again she heard the noise...louder this time...it sounded like someone crying, not just crying, but sobbing.

_Who is it? _She questioned hurrying towards it. She hadn't really ever heard Ichigo crying, and couldn't really imagine him doing so...but his was the only presence she felt.

She saw they figure kneeling on the ground. Part of her didn't want to believe it, but that orange hair was unmistakeable. It was him. She stood behind him for a moment, trying to build up enough courage to say or do something.

"Kurosaki-kun?" She asked softly. He turned around, it was obvious that he was crying, but what struck he most was the look in his eyes, one of utmost hopelessness and regret. Seeing that made her feel as if the whole world had crushed down around her, her heart crumbled, something had to be dreadfully wrong. Ichigo was a strong person. He didn't usually display these type of emotions lightly.

He seemed to be panicking about something. He was gasping for breath, staring down infront of him, shaking in horror.

"I-I..." He started but trailed off, he moved to the side, revealing a bloody Rukia. Her eyes were closed, her body motionless. Orihime ran to her side, immediantly checking Rukia's pulse...but there wasn't one...Rukia Kuchiki was dead. Orihime quickly turned around to Ichigo.

"What happened to Kuchiki-san!?" She shouted, clearly upset. Raised his hands up, staring at them. It was hard to see in the dark...but there was something on them...

Orihime realized that Ichigo was almost entirely coated in blood as well. He was bleeding from several bad wounds, but other than that his face, his shihakushyou, his hands were all splattered with blood.

"I-I...killed her." He stuttered. Orihime stared at him in shock, she wanted to deny it, she tried with all her heart to deny it, but all of the evidence pointed to the contrary. She sank down to her knees. Was the man she loved, a killer? Was Rukia really dead?

"Why?" She gasped, tears now trickling down her cheeks as well. He crumbled forward, slamming his fist into the ground. He ignored her question.

"I'll make you pay for this!" He bellowed, his voice cracking with rage. Orihime watched him, shocked and confused.

_Ha! Make me pay? How do plan to do that, Ichigo? You're too weak. Do you think any of this would've happened if you weren't? _He could hear the hollow mocking him in his mind.

"You didn't have any reason to kill her!" Ichigo growled. Orihime reluctantly put her hand on his shoulder;

_I did it to watch you suffer, Ichigo! I told you, didn't I? I'm going to destroy your life and everyone in it. When you have nothing left you'll be too weak to fight and this body of yours will be mine!_

"Let's get out of here, Kurosaki-" She started, her mind was spinning in circles, utterly confused, and all she wanted to do at the moment, that actually made sense, was to get out of there. _Ooo, that woman would be fun to kill, wouldn't you say Ichigo? But she seems really weak compared to the other one...what a pity..._

"I won't let you do that! I won't let you hurt anyone else." He muttered before looking at Orihime. She was staring at him like he was some lunatic or something, was he talking to her? She quickly slid Rukia's body onto her back, she ran out of the tunnel. The way he was acting frightened her, she knew she might be hurting him but she couldn't help it.

"Inoue!" She heard him shout, desperation clear in his vioce. It made her heart ache, but her legs wouldn't let her go back to him. When she was outside she ran a ways down the road, struggling to carry Rukia. She finally collapsed in front of a tall office building.

Reality slowly set in, as she realized that Rukia was dead and nothing could change that, she sat on the ground crying her little heart out. _Kurosaki-kun..._She worried. She had just ditched him, even though he probably really needed someone right now. But he made her feel extremely uncomfortable, frightened even. She wished she had a cell phone or something so she could call the others. She should have brought something, considering she'd only come looking for them because she was worried.

Orihime was going to head back to town, but she didn't know about leaving Ichigo. Of course Urahara had his body still so he'd have to come back, and he was able to take care of himself. _But Kurosaki-kun really loved her. _She admitted to herself, she'd known it for a long time, everyone probably did, but she'd played ignorant when she could. Rukia and her were good friends but...she loved Ichigo too, and she felt that if she admitted that she knew it would be wrong to continue liking him.

Orihime wandered back to the tunnel, she once again stood peering nervously into the entrance.

Ichigo struggled to keep him self up, he pushed against the wall and tried to continue forward without falling. It hurt. That Arrancar had done quite a number on him, the wounds were deep and plentiful. He had a cut down his left arm that was so deep he could see the bone, and it was that arm he was using to prop himself up against the wall. His arm felt like it was engulfed in flames, but he endured it, telling himself that he deserved it.

"Where'd ya put Zangetsu?" He complaind to his hollow, not really expecting an answer, his eyes searched the darkness. It should be around here somewhere...he'd dropped it as soon as he had regained control. _As if you could carry it._ The Hollow laughed. _Seems you scared that girl away._

"Just be quite, would you. You usually don't talk so much." He retorted, just then his hand slipt and he fell foreward onto the ground. He lay for a moment cringing in pain.

_Ha! Don't make me laugh, you don't usually respond so much. Mmm...that hurt, didn't it? But you deserve it for being weak, don't you? Keep beating yourself up...it's fun to watch...Ichigo! _Ichigo forced himself up. It was sort of scarey...he was so close it felt like the hollow was standing right behind him. He couldn't help but wish that Orihime would come back. He started wandering...how was he supposed to live, after this? He didn't feel like he could stand it...he felt crushed under the weight of these pilling burdens, and without her to support him he saw no reason to continue.

He had friends...he had family...he needed to protect them...he needed to keep going for them...but how can you protect them when you're a threat yourself?

He managed to stand up again, cursing under his breath, he took turns scooting each foot foreward as he hung onto the wall of the tunnel. Baring in mind the whole way that it was his fault, that he wasn't able to stop her from being mercisly slaugthered before his eyes. She had run in here to try and get away... She was so desperate...to get away from him. His throat tightened and he sunk down to his knees. He felt like he was going to vomit, he lurched foreward, a river of blood seeping down his chin. His vision was getting blurry, though he could hardly see anything in here in the first place. His body refused to move, it was shaking with anger and grief. He hurt all over but nothing compared to the pain in his heart which felt like it was being stabbed by one thousand white hot knives. _Ha, how weak! You're just going to sit here and let yourself die?!_

Ichigo leaned against the wall behind him, staring into the darkness by his feet. He smiled sadly; "Yeah, pretty much."

He was pretty close to the entrance, he could smell the stingy, worn air of the deserted city. The light was bright, stinging his eyes, he couldn't see anything outside. Sitting in his bed of pain, it was hard to think of anything other then death, other then guilty.

_Get up, Ichigo! You're so fragile! That girl should stilll be around, ya don't want me to kill her to do you?_ Ichigo ignored him, not wanting the hollow to be able to control him even though he was still in control. But he felt it whelming inside him, his eyes were probably changing as well, not probably, they were, he could feel it. He fought it, but he was weak, it was taking all of his strength. He could now hear Orihime calling his name, he wanted to tell her get away but he couldn't say anything. She walked right past him, her sense blocked by the build up of reiatsu. He expected the Hollow to try hard sense she was now there, but he seemed to let go and fall back entirely.

Ichigo seized the chance, ignoring everything he ran out of the tunnel as quick as he could. He just had to get away from this place.

**Chapter 1; END. I'll have the next chapter up in a bit...**

**1-I apologize if it isn't the most original storyline you've ever heard, I haven't read very many fanfictions so I'm not really sure what's out there.**

**2-I know I said IchixRuk...I wasn't going to kill her...but I realized I had to. She seems like the type of person who would just forgive him, and be mad if he felt really guilty. "Just get strong, idiot." Something like that...so yeah...I killed Rukia...-evil smile-**

**3- Thank you very much for reading! I hope you liked it!**

**There should be at least one more chapter XD.**

**-Shirochan**


	2. Chapter 2

**w 'ello, again. This is Chapter 2! If your reading this hopefully that means you like it. As I said before, it's my 1st fanfic so it's probably not the best. I apologize for any grammar or spelling errors, I try to catch them. **

**Disclaimer: Bleach isn't mine. I don't own it or any part of it, it all belong to Kubo Tite. - (Thanks Kubo!).**

**Let the chapter begin!:**

Kurosaki Ichigo made his way down the crowded street, it took a great deal of effort. He gasped desperately for breath, constantly choking up blood. He only hoped that he wouldn't run into anyone he knew, because he knew that afterwards he would have to explain what happened, but he wasn't ready for that. It was sort of lonely though, no one paid any mind to the teenager, struggling with each step to stay alive. It wasn't their fault though, they couldn't see him.

He had decided to go home. His family ran a clinic so there should be stuff there that could help him. The only one who could see him was his sister Karin (as far as he knew XD), he knew she would help him. He didn't want to pull her into this whole Shinigami mess, he'd done that to Orihime and Chad, and he felt guilty ever time he saw them hurt because of it. But he wouldn't let Karin get involved with everything, at the very least she'd be glad that he let here in with something do to with it. When she confessed that she knew he pretty much refused to talk to her about it, and in the end had almost ignored her interly.

Running like that, had turned out to be very regretful. He had thought he'd killed himself by doing so, his lungs were so full of blood he felt like he was drowning. He was still coughing it up, but the coughing was excruciatingly painful. Even the most miniscule movement seemed to shock ever nerve in his body; yet some how he still continued. even though he couldn't really see a reason for it.

Finally, FINALLY! He reached his street, he could see his house! He held onto the top of the wall for support. He was almost to the door when he realized, he'd never found Zangetsu, he'd left his sword in that tunnel. It was too late to back and get it now, he'd have to go back some other time, even thought the thought of returning was...

Ichigo reached the door, he could hardly see anymore, his body didn't have the strength to move, but he forced forward anyway. Almost there...he twisted the door knob, pushing it open, he clambered inside.

Karin was at the table, lazily holding a book in her hand which she only seemed to be devoting half her attention to. He could hear Yuzu in the kitchen, cabinets and dishes occasionaly clanking. Lucky his father didn't attack; he wasn't even in the room, hopefully, was in the front tending to business or better yet gone off somewhere.

"Welcome home, Ichi. You're sure home early." Karin said, not taking her eyes of her book, no matter how bored with it she seemed to be. Things between the two of them had been a little off lately, his presence made her feel uncomfortable so she just hoped he'd go into the other room so she could not feel as tense. Ichigo was supporting himself against the wall with his arm, he rolled, holding himself up with his back. Knowing he'd finally be able to rest soon, he didn't feel as strong anymore, it was like his body was falling asleep, dying ahead of him.

"...Karin..." Ichigo groaned, not having much will to say anything. Karin lowered her book an turned around. For a moment she just stared, stunned by his appearance. He'd come home a couple times before a little bloody and bruised from trouble with gangs and what-not. But this was the worst she'd ever seen him, plus he was in his Shinigami robes, which appeared to be drenched. It wasn't raining outside today though...was it? She ran over to him, instinctively shouting for her sister and her father. Ichigo started blacking out, he slid to the ground. He'd made it...but had he lost too much blood?

Yuzu ran up to them. She looked down at the huddled mess infront of the door, upon realizing who it was she shreiked in fear, just hoping from the bottom of her heart that he was still alive. Her heart raced, she tried to decide what to do first but her mind was confused and jumbled.

Karin bent down and hoisted her brother up onto her back. Thankfuly stepping up to the plate.

"Get a bed!" She shouted to her sister, who instantly took off to find one. _Where's dad? _She questioned, getting frustrated. Yuzu raced back in, pushing in a bed from the one of the clinic rooms. They quickly lifted him onto it, wheeling him as fast as they could to somewhere easier to operate.

From holding him Karin's back was soaking in blood, the smell of iron followed her but neither seemed to notice exactly how much blood they were now covered with...or how much he'd lost. Yuzu tried to remove the top part of his shihakushyou, she merely touched them and her hand was imprinted with blood. He was completely soaked in it. That was a scarey thought to his sisters, they both wandered what had happened, but feared the answer. They ran about the room like crazy, they were really worried about him.

When they hooked up the heart rate machine to him it didn't showed that his heart wasn't beating, this of cousre gave them a scare, but he had pulse so they blamed the machine. They kept trying different ones but none seemed to work.

"What's wrong with these things!" Karin yelled, punching the wall.

"He's gonna need stiches! We should transport him to the hospital! Oooh, where's dad!" Yuzu shouted from where she was bandaging his wounds hurriedly, hoping to stopped the flow of blood. This of course frustrated Karin more, but also forced her to realize why the machines weren't working. He wasn't in his body, so basically they were trying to operate on a ghost. If they tried to send him to the hospital like this they'd probably just get laughed at! He'd gotten hurt out fighting before but he'd always come back already all bandaged up, though she hated to admit it, she wished he'd gone to wherever that was that usually helped him...there had to be somewhere he usually went to... She decided that they at least needed to get him back in his body. But where'd he leave it?

"We can't, Yuzu." She admitted, trying to fight the urge to cry.

"But even if we bandage all his wounds there's a good chance he'll still die of blood-" Yuzu argued, not understanding her sisters reasons. They heard the front door shut, Yuzu jumped up running to see who was. Karin wandered back over to the bed, staring down at her brother sadly. She couldn't help but wander what had happened, why was this time so different. She knew he hated coming home when he was hurt, even if it was just a little, because he didn't like them worrying about him. But in that way she felt really sorry for him, he didn't want people worrying about him so even when he was having trouble he'd never let any one know. Instead he'd just try to face it on his own, in that way he was completely blocked off from them. How lonely that must feel... _Who knows what your life really is like? Who knows really, all that you've been through? I wish you could talk more about this stuff, Ichi-nii. How many times have you almost died? How many times have you come home smothered in guilt and sadness that we've failed to notice? When mom died I didn't think I'd ever see you smile again. But you just learned to push it down inside and keep struggling on. How many times have you done that, for us?_

The door opened and Yuzu and their father ran in. Their father stopped, looking at the bed, for a moment there was a flash of worry in his eyes but then it faded, realizing that his son was in his Shinigami robes; he choose to keep up his secret rather than help his son, eeven though he knew he'd feel he felt extremely guilty for it later.

"What's going on, Yuzu, is this the wrong room?"He asked, trying to sound confused. Yuzu stared at him, shocked. Just what was he talking about? What did he mean?!

"B-but dad, Ichi-nii is...Ichi-nii is..." She trailed of, trying to not let herself believe what she'd just realized. It wasn't possible that Ichigo was already...

"Dad's the only one of us who can't see ghosts." Karin confirmed for her, her voice showing hints of sorrow. Yuzu broke down into tears. Their father comforted her, looking at Karin with a questioning look. Karin was unsure how to answer, unsure how to comfurt Yuzu, unsure about seemingly everything. Isshin patted Yuzu on the head before swiftly hurring to the door.

"I'll be right back, I need to make a phone call." He called, before leaving, leaving the girls alone in the room with their "dead", dying brother to mule over what uncertainties they had.

**Chapter 2; End. D: Long, boring day. I managed a whole chapter wYay!. **

**1- I hope you're liking it! Is it, perhaps, a bit too dramatic? Not enough? Just right?**

**I will be writing another chapter so expect one shortly!**

**-Shirochan**


	3. Chapter 3

* * *

**Yay! The story seems to be going somewhere (hopefully)! Already onto chapter 3! It's 1:30 in the morning and I'm starting a new chapter. Ugh...already...so...tired...**

**Disclaimer: I, in no way, shape, or form, own Bleach.**

**Thanks for the reviews!**

* * *

**  
**

Orihime tried to zero in on Ichigo's reiatsu, but the tunnel was over flowing with it. The raggedness of his reiatsu was suffocating her, smothering her so that she could hardly breathe.

"Kurosaki-kun!" She shouted again, but there wasn't an answer this time either. She had the sinking feeling he wasn't here anymore; but since he wasn't responding she was afraid he might have died. Shivering uncomfortably the young woman searched around just to make sure. She remember back, before Rukia came, how innocent and goof-ballish she had been. She had babbled about incoherent things that didn't even make sense to her anymore. That summer she'd been through rather a lot; she had changed, they all had changed. They were forced to grow-up, to mature. It made her sad knowing that she was the one who had been through the least, standing off to the side of the battle, completely useless. She was weak.

She didn't find Ichigo even after searching through the tunnel for him, however she did happen across his sword again. _Zangetsu, right? _She wondered peering down at it. That was strange...Ichigo never went anywhere without his sword, but...given the circumstances this time might be different. Orihime bent down, grabbing the bandaged hilt with both of her hands, she tried to pick it up. She toppled foreward from the weight, clanking loudly as it hit the ground.. It wasn't that it hadn't looked heavey, it was just the way Ichigo could fight with it at such ease made it look light. Caring that around had to be bad for his back...

Orihime drug the sword back to where she'd left Rukia, though not in the fanciful way she had hoped for. Her heart cracked from even trying to lighten up; she felt like mabye she wasn't being a good friend to Rukia if she was able not to endlessly sob. She feared that she might have somewhere deep down wished for this.

----------

Yuzu had calmmed down a bit, but she was still crying, huddled up in one of the chairs. Karin stood at her brothers side, for a moment she wanted to yell at him for coming here because he was crushing his little sisters heart, making her bubble over in a shaky fit of emotion. She didn't like seeing Yuzu like that, and for those few minutes she _blamed_ Ichigo. She blamed him for coming to his own family for help, she had blamed him for the one time since their mothers death he'd actually crossed that wall between them to ask for help. Realizing what she was doing she too began feeling extremely guilty. She knew that if he was awake he would have blamed himself too. That's all he ever did, blame himself and then push it down, hide it deep with in soul. Just another coal to the flame she knew would eventually engulf him, burning away his life entirely.

That idiot would always stick his own head on the line for anyone, just insanely obsessed with protecting everyone around him. She wondered if that too was some paranoia he developed after his mothers death. Everyone was upset after she had past away, everyone had changed...but Ichigo had changed just...too much it was painful. Plus now that he had these Shinigami powers, he must have all sorts of things weighing him down. Karin knew that the most pain she'd ever felt probably wasn't even compareable to what he felt every single day of his life. She slipt her hand into his.

"Please get better, Ichi-nii." Karin whispered to him.

Just then the door squeaked open, revealing a strange man. He had a mop of blonde hair flowing out from under his stripped hat. His presence was particularly green in it's own way, forcing look-uponers to study him for several minutes before their mind could grasp all the details of his attire. He tapped lightly on the door with his cane.

"Please execuse my intrusion, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to steal that boy from you." The man said with a smirk, his eyes barely visible from under the hat. Karin rushed between the strange man and her brother, not taking one second to think about what she was doing.

"I won't let you touch him!" She shouted with all her might, it was her turn to protect him. But the man's expression changed, and he reacted totally different then how she was expecting him to.

"Calm down, I was only joking." He said waving his fan at her, before bringing it up to cover his face. He entired the room slowly, bowing slightly. "Urahara Kisuke. I can help your brother."

Both of the sisters eyes lit up with hope both simutaneously gasping "Really?", because they suspected this might be some sort of dream, an illusion created from their stressed prayers. The man nodded, his expression hidden and left unknown.

"But I need both of you to promise that no matter what, you will not tell your brother I was here, understand?"

The sisters where a bit confused as to his reasoning but eventually agreed, as long as he was better that was all that mattered. Of course both of them were filled with questions but both heald their tounges as Urahara walked over Ichigo and began examining him. Karin couldn't resist anymore; for all she knew he could be some enemy hoping for a chance to mess with her brother.

"Who are you?"

Urahara stopped and turned to her.

"I thought I already told you, my name is Urahara Kisuke." He said forcing confusion into his vioce, even though his face featured a display of amusement.

"How do you know Ichigo?"

Urahara grinned. "He doesn't talk to you very much, does he? I know him very well, you could call us allies, or maybe even friends-"

He was going to say more but he was he was interupted by a soft "meow". Everyones attention turned to the strange black cat that seemed to have slipt in unnoticed. Urahara smiled grinned even more as he walked over to the cat.

"Hey, Yoruichi! Just in time! What a good kitty!" He said in an overly happy, baby talking sort of way as he petted the animals head. The feline only glared up at him, causing him to become more serious. "Please go get Tessai, we'll need his kidou. I was hoping Kuchiki-san would be here but I don't feel her reiatsu at all..."

The cat nodded it's head before slinking out the door. Yuzu gasped in astonishment...had that cat just nodded?! Could the cat understand him?! Urahara chuckled at her reaction. But Karin was shocked at something else.

"Y-you know Rukia-chan?"

Urahara tiled his head to the side, trying to come up with a good way of answering that, he once again lifted up his fan to cover his face. He finally decided on a simple;

"Yes."

Yuzu looked at the clock worriedly; "Rukia-chan should be home soon, she's usually here by now."

----------

Ichigo sat on the side of the building, hugging his knees to his chest as he watched the empty streets below. It was the same as always, except for the clouds were large and thunderuos, rain pouring down on his back, trickling down his body before slipping away to the ground. It was a strange feeling, not one he liked very much. He finally understood why Zangetsu hated the rain so much. Here it was lonely, oh so very lonely...the rain only seemed to be laughing at that loneliness. Pounding like little fists on his back, giving him nothing but to reflect upon his heavy heart, forcing him to recall the one person who had been able to stop the rain.

--------

Orihime crossed her fingers, hoping her idea would work, praying it would work. Praying that her powers were strong enough or different enough to help Rukia. It was worth a shot, she concentraited on Rukia.

"Souten Kisshun!"

Two fairies popped from her hair pins, buzzing around like little bugs before forming a barrier around Rukia.

* * *

**-shock-Will it work?**

**Sorry if my chapters are a bit short. I'm glad if you like it so far though.**

**I've also noticed that my chapter layout wasn't turning out how I'd like it too so I'm trying something a different for this one, if it works I'll go back and update the other two. -Shiro**


	4. Chapter 4

**- Oi. Monson season! The rain adds to the feeling at some parts...how fun... This is the 4th chapter I've written in 3 days!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.**

* * *

**  
**

Ichigo wasn't paying attention, he didn't feel the presence of the person standing behind him. That person just stood and watched for several minutesbefore becoming bored.

Ichigo suddenly felt a hand on his head, snapping out of his trance he flung onto his feet and twisted around to see who it was. The snowy image of himself smirked. Ichigo instantly grabbed his zanpaktou's hilt, preparing to draw it.

"What do you want?" Ichigo growled, lifting his other arm to block the rain that he was staring into. The white shinigami laughed.

"I just wanted to talk before ya left." He responded, his smirk turning into a menacing grin. "Just incase you were getting the wrong idea about how this is gonna work."

"'If I die you die', I remember you saying that. The whole way here you were just threatening me to keep yourself alive, wouldn't it have been easier to just take over and do it yourself? I was weak, you could've easily taken over, but you didn't; your up to something! What are you doing?" Ichigo was hoping he'd give out some sort of information that he'd be able to use to an advantage. The hollow's grimmace shrunk a little.

"Yeah, I did, for two reasons. One- I can't feel you're bodies pain unless I'm incontrol, but even that is just a trivial matter. Because unlike you, I'm strong enough to not let little scratches like that slow me. Yes, I could have and I would've easily taken charge, possibly perminantly, but that just leads me to number two; I did it to watch you suffer." The hollow laughed. "And to answer you last question; 'what am I doing?', that is exactly what I'm doing. Another thing I already told you of course. I'm going to crush you mentally untill you don't have any strength left. You'll be stuck in the dark recesses of your own mind, watching while I destroy everything you hold dear."

Ichigo swung his blade in rage, the hollow quickly stopped it with his own.

"Your choice doesn't make sense, however, at least you're friends can defend themselves, but instead you chose your poor, defenseless, little sisters." His hollow form mocked. Ichigo's eyes flew open with anger.

"...you wouldn't." Ichigo pushed the hollows blade off of his own and took another swing at the hollows side. Before the blade made contact he felt himself being hurled backward, darkness swallowing him up.

------

Ichigo shot up; gasping for beath. He was drenched in sweat, his heart was beating at an insane rate, and his head hurt. Upon realizing he was in one of the rooms of their clinic he tried to pull it together. His sisters were asleep at his feet, they seemed to have pulled up chairs but fallen asleep using his matress as a pillow. The lights were dimmed so the room was dark.

He relaxed seeing that everything was alright. _The hollow was right. This was a bad idea. _With a heavy sigh he fell back into the pillows behind him. _What am I supposed to do?_

Then he realized that his body didn't hurt very much, his wounds were nearly all healed. No matter how awesome his sisters were at what they did, they were definetly not that good, they couldn't heal something like this in a few hours. It had to be the work of kidou. _Rukia_, he instantly thought, hope flowing back into his heart. Even though he wasn't very good at sensing peoples reiatsu he tried to find Rukia's. He tried and he tried for hours, everytime he failed to find it he just told himself that it was because he was bad at this...but in the end he never found it.

Preparing to try again, he adjusted himself, which caused Karin to lift her head up and look at him through her sleep clouded eyes.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." He whispered, hoping she'd go back to sleep, but seeing that he was awake she forced her self up.

"Ichi-nii! How are you feeling?" He smiled at her but she caught the flash of sadness that went across his eyes. It was the way he smiled when he was trying to make people see he was okay so they'd stop worrying about him, when he was trying to hide that something was wrong.

"Just about as good as new." He answered.

Karin beamed up at him, causing his heart to feel worse, knowing that that monster was planning on killing her. His eyes averted hers instantly, afraid that maybe she could see through him to the evil inside.

"Karin...thanks for helping me, really."

"Thanks for trusting me, Ichi-nii."

There was a short moment of silence, Ichigo's eyes drifted over to his other sister who was still fast asleep.

"Does she know?" He asked.

"Sort of, I didn't really explain anything to her. I thought you would if you wanted her to know."

Ichigo ran his hand through his carroty-colored hair, letting out a smale groan. It was his fault she could even seem him because of his ever spouting reiatsu that tended to

effect thoughs around him.

"Please, tell me..." Karin start nervously. "Please tell more about this whole shinigami thing." Ichigo began stuttereing, trying to find his words.

"I...uh...I don't really know what to tell you..." He finally gave her, not wanting to bring her into all of this. He began actually wishing he was back inside his gloomy whacked-out mind.

"Where did you really go this summer?" She questioned, trying to dig further into his life.

"I told you, I was staying with some friends in Osaka." He answered, slightly panicking that she'd catch his lie, and she did.

"Don't lie, Ichi-nii, you don't have any friends in Osaka." Her vioce was sounding more and more strict.

"We were staying with Orihime's grandmother who lives in Osaka."

"You're lying, after you left more and more monsters started appearing, the ones you usually battle, Ichi-nii wouldn't go somewhere to have fun knowing that those monsters could hurt people here. You were doing something important."

"Okay then, you got me, I was away on some important business."

"Doing what?"

"Meetings, paper work...that sort of stuff."

"Doing what?" Karin said, ignoring his response, knowing it wasn't true.

"Fine! I was in Soul Society rescueing Rukia from being executed, happy?" Ichigo shouted, trying to withhold his annoyance at his sisters prying. Karin looked at him stunned, making sure it was the truth this time before taking a deep breath. Soul Society...? Rukia's...execution? What had she done? Rukia always seemed so nice, she

couldn't be a deliquent, could she?

"W-what was the crime?" Karin stuttered, afraid it might turn out to be something bad. Ichigo look up at the far corner of the room, sighing because he couldn't believe he was telling her this.

"For giving me her shinigami powers."

He didn't have chance to catch his sisters reaction, he doubled over in pain, the laughing vioce of the hollow ringing in his ears. _Sorry for interupting your conversation, Ichigo! But I told you this was a bad choice, didn't I? Two helpless little girls. I thought it might be funner to wait until you got her undivided attention. _He felt like he was being pushed back, he could feel Karin shaking his arm, shouting his name, but he couldn't respond. He fought with all his might to move foreward, to stay in control. He burst forth for one split second.

"Run!" He yelled before getting sucked back under.

Karin backed up from the bed unsure of what was happening. Her brother seemed to be in pain, bent over and struggling, but then it stopped, his shoulders and back relaxing, he sat up. But there was something wrong when he looked at her; his eyes were black, irises shining yellow, he grinned at her in a way she'd never seen from her brother. It wasn't the sad-ish sort of smile he usually had, this was...scarey, this screamed of lunacy and madness.

"What's a matter, sister?"

* * *

**How was that? Cliff-hanger enough? XD I hope you enjoyed Chapter 4!**

**Thanks for reading!**

**-Shirokun**


	5. Chapter 5

**On to Chapter Five! Yay! Thanks so much for the reviews and the favorites/alert...list...addition...things...!**

**Swift-Star9: Place decscription, awesome, I'll try to remember that from now on. XD Yes, she needed to die.**

**Godzilla2: Thank you, I upped the rating like you suggested. Thanks again for your support.**

**firestar16: People don't seem to want Ichigo to die...I'll have to try and resist the temptation...**

**hollowheart3: Thank you for the second review!!! I'm glad you like it!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.**

**---------------------------------------------------**

Orihime stared up at the 5-story-tall, rusty, old building. It's walls were cracked and it was crumbling in upon itself; it looked how her heart felt. Her eyes moved down, noting all the imperfections of the place. Astonished at the way the broken glass door distorted her reflection she listened as the collapsing city whispered words of lonesomeness to her. The sky here was clouded in a dull smog, that was barely visible due to the darkness of the night, and the air smelt foul, this whole place was a representation of that which had been forgotten.

The glowing, orange barrier shattered, it's pieces dissolving into the air. Orihime watched as the two fairies whized in a circle around the bloody, lifeless body of the girl who would inevitably become forgotten as well. Ayame flew to her side, landing on her quivering shoulder.

"I'm sorry, we were unable to do anything, she's already dead." Ayame apologized, before both fairies turned into a streak of light and disappeared into Orihime's hairclip.

Orihime plopped onto the dusty broken side walk, holding back the urge to cry again.

------------------------------------------------

Karin lunged foreward, grabbing Yuzu by the shirt, she pulled her twin to the opposite side of the room.

"Wake up!" She shouted as Yuzu complained tiredly. Ichigo slipt off of the bed laughing.

"What's a matter? Is something wrong?" He asked again in a vioce that wasn't his, slowly walking closer and closer. White particles began to form some sort of structure infront of his face, he laughed at their frightened expressions.

"Y-you're not Ichigo." Karin stuttered. 'Ichigo' stopped, the mask now covering a quarter of his face, he looked at his hands.

"Are you sure?" The hollow laughed, looking back up at her. "It looks like you still don't have Zangetsu. I guess I'll have to kill them with my bare hands." The girls made a break for the door but the hollow was faster, he struck his arm out infront of them.

"Where are you going? I thought you wanted to know more about this 'shinigami thing'." He mocked, trying to look serious. The girls knew something was wrong, absolutely, terribly wrong. They searched desperately for an escape route.

"What did you do with Onii-chan?" Yuzu squeaked fearfully. The hollow reached out and grabbed Yuzu's arm, he bent down to her, his mask now near completion.

"I think I'll kill her first, Ichigo." Her brother cackled, Yuzu scrambled to get away but his grip was too tight. She began crying;

"Please, Onii-chan, stop."

The hollow let go of her, acting like he was giving in but suddenly whacked her with such force she hit the opposing wall and sank to the floor unconscious. He grinned fanatically, turning to Karin. He threw punch at her, he would have made contact too but Ichigo managed to stop him for a split second. Karin dodged around him and ran out the door.

"You're too weak to win against me, Ichigo, be patient while I kill the other one. I'll give you control back soon enough."

Karin ran into the living room, hoping she'd find her father._ Why him? He can't even see...! Who am I supposed to go to for help? _She had to hide somewhere...somewhere he wouldn't expect her to be. She could hear the _pit-pattering_ as rain began to fall on the windows. Since nobody had been in here all the lights were off making it hard to see. Finally she decided where to go, she ran as fast as she could up the stairs, around the corner, and into her brothers bedroom. She searched around franically, partly inclined to shut his window that was letting in the rain and giving the room a creepy, chilly feeling.

Karin quietly climbed into his closet, shutting the door softly so he wouldn't hear.

The closet was warm, full of comforters and blankets. She curled up, trying to steady her breathing so she could hear.

Silence...

She strained her ears for even the smallest noise.

Silence...

Maybe she was safe, maybe he hadn't expected her to hide here. _ Yes,_ she thought, _I'm safe, everything will be- _

But her thoughts were interupted by that crazy laughing as the door to the closet slid open. The figures sadistic features illuminated from a flash of lightning as he reached into pull her out. Karin screamed, dodging around his hand and out of the closet, she made a break for the open window. Without a second thought she jumped.

There was a sickening _crack_ as she hit the ground, landing on top of her arm. The bone snapped in half, a large portion of it broke through the skin, poking out like some threatening white dagger already drenched in blood. Karin rolled of, cringing as pain bolted up her arm. She struggled to stand, knowing that she didn't have time to let the pain hold her back; she needed to run.

"Ichigo" landed softly on the ground next to her, laughing once again. She managed to get to her feet, she took off running toward the gate. The yard was small, surrounded by a tall brick wall, she had to get somewhere bigger...though outrunning him seemed impossible.

Karin clutched her broken arm to her chest, ignoring the terrible, throbbing pain. The grass was wet, her feet slipped out from under her, she crashed agonizingly onto the ground. The hollow walked up to her, seeing this as a chance fit to kill.

"Good bye." He said, slightly disappointented that it was over. Karin tried to get away, tears flowing from her eyes like endless water falls. He picked her up by the throat, mercilessly choking her.

"...please...Ichi-nii..." She managed, pulling helplessly at his hand; trying to stop it. She couldn't even begin to imagine that some how she might live through this...if she could only change him back somehow...

"Put her down, Ichigo." Commanded a vioce from behind him.

--------------------------------------------

**End of Chapter.**

**This one is the shortest yet, but I thought this might be the best place to stop. **

**-Shiro"sama" xDD.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Yoa, Shiro here. Starting on Chapter 6! The time is 10:07 p.m. on a dark and rainy desert night. Currently sketching a picture of Ichigo in his "Ground Rescue" outfit and listening to D-tecnolife! -Can you say "Bleachtard"? OMG, thank you guys soo much for reviewing, Reading them makes me really happy! -Rereads reviews for the tenth time today- I submited chapter 5 a couple of hours ago, I'm going to try to finish this before bed...hopefully...**

**Uniasus; Yes, I know what you mean. I've realized that I give the hardest time to my favorite chatracter, torture them, usually make their life a living hell...kill them if I feel like it...you know, the whole sha-bang. Seeing them hopeless is addictive; sorry if that sounds scary... OwO**

**firestar16; Glad you like it! o But killing characters is fuuun...we'll see...**

**Godzilla2; XD Sick, yay; I love that! I'm taking it as a compliment (no sarcasm). Okay, I understand what you're saying, I'll remember that in the future. This chapter is the longest so far, enough, more, less?**

**Swift-Star9; Thanks, I hope this chapter will give you a better idea about where she's at. Okay, remebers...I'll keep that in mind when I edit. I'm gonna need a note pad...write down all of your guys's suggestions (which I appreciate.) Mind you description always been my weak spot. XD Thanks, and good luck on your essay!**

**Thanks hollowheart3 and Lesser Master for their reviews, I don't really have anything to say but; I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

**Disclaimer: Bleach; not something I own.**

**---------------------------------------------------------------**

"Put her down, Ichigo." Commanded a voice from behind him. The hollow-fied Ichigo looked over shoulder frowning a bit. If there was one thing he hated more then being stuck in this weaklings mind it was being interupted when he was having fun. There was a familiar man with dark brown hair that seemed to stick straight up into the air, probably around his early 40s. He was wearing a plain white t-shirt, that was now almost see-through from the rain, and a pair of black jeans. The hollow glared out from under the mask.

"I don't see any reason why I should," He grinned. "Unless you think a lowly human like you could stop me."

Isshin glowered. Something had to be done and fast. He ran at it, attempting to knee the hollow in the back but it scouted to the side, dodging easily, ridiculing him with it's evil laughter. His mind-lost son turned to face him, still strangling Karin in his outstretched hand, his grip on her throat tightened. Isshin backed up a couple steps slowly.

"We both know you don't want to do this, Ichigo, so let go. I don't want to hurt you but I will." Isshin warned, the most serious he'd ever been.

"Ha! You honestly think he's doing this? I expected his family to know him better than that. You haven't quiet figured it out-"

Isshin caught him off guard, he lunged foreward, quickly grabbing Ichigo's arm with both of his hands; one near his wrist and the other by his shoulder. He bend it up until it snapped and broke at the elbow. The hollow shreiked, dropping the girl to the ground and jumping back. It took a momment but the masked, carrot-topped hollow managed to regain his composer, the broken arm dangling uselessy at his side.

"Darn, you're ruining my fun, old man." He complained, dodging the series of kicks and punches that Isshin baraded him with. "I bet you thought he joined Aizen or something. The man with the stripped hat never told you about what happenened, did he?" Isshin stopped, wipping the sweat from his foreward with the back of his arm. He was trying to get the hollow into the corner of the brick wall so it wouldn't be able to dodge, and keeping it away from Karin at the same time, the hollow was really fast; he didn't even seem to be breaking a sweat! What was he talking about...? Urahara did have an uncanny nack of doing things that messed up other peoples futures...at least his son hadn't joined Aizen like he had feared for a moment there...but there had to be something with this mask...apparently something Urahara had been keeping from him...at least if this wasn't Ichigo he didn't have to hold back. Perhaps it was some hollow able to change it's appearance, and Arrancar most likely. But he could feel Ichigo's reiatsu eminating from this spiritual body. It had to be him. This frustrated him to a great extent, not wanting to give the hollow a chance to fight back he swung his leg, hoping to trip it. Of course this was futile, the hollow simply grabbed his leg before he got hit. But now Isshin was in trouble, the hollow easily lifted him and slammed him hard into the ground.

"Stupid human." The hollow muttered, walking past him, back toward where Karin lay, trembling on the ground, gasping for breath. Isshin grabbed ahold of his leg, slowly standing up, the hollow turned around and kicked him, sending him flying back a couple feet. Isshin recovered almost instantly, knowing his daughter was in danger, he ran at the hollow, once again barading it with a series of punches and kicks that the hollow blocked tirelessly with his unbroken arm.

"I don't suppose you know where Rukia and Orihime are?" Isshin asked, hoping he could get information and distract the hollow at the same time. Urahara had explained to him earlier about Ichigo and Rukia going to fight the Arrancar, about Orihime going after them, about them not coming back. The whole thing wreaked of misforutne. After seeing this, he was afriad that something similair might've happened.

"Who knows? Maybe I do, maybe I don't." The hollow chuckled, swiftly dodging a rapid set of punches. Isshin took that as I sign that the hollow must know something if he answered in a joking manner like that, right in that moment he managed connect a blow to the face, the hollows smile grew as the mask shattered and evaporated into the air. The blackness receded and the glowing yellow orbs changed, but Isshin didn't notice this.

"Where are Rukia and Orihime, Ichigo?" Isshin shouted (though he wasn't actually sure what he should call the hollow), landing another hit in the stomach that the hollow, surprisingly, made no attempt to block. Ichigo feel to his knees, his eyes wide, shaking violently. Detecting this distinct change Isshin abrubtly halted.

Ichigo struggled to get past the shock of what had happened, he'd lost himself again. His heart felt like it was stuck in his thoat, the excitment running through his vains had turned to pure fear. Silently he wished that this was a dream, that this had not just happened...but it didn't go away.

Ichigo pursed his eyes shut, trying to not cry, he was stronger than that...he was stronger than that...but why was it always his fault? Why is it that everytime someone he needs, some one he loves to the core of his being, dies, it's his fault? If there was a God, he must've really hated the poor, little, orange-headed adolescent. First his mother, his own mother for whom he'd give up the world just to see her smile once more. Then Rukia, Rukia Kuchiki, the girl he'd risked life and limb for to rescue from execution! God (if he excisted) knew that he'd go through every painful, hopeless second that he'd endured over and over, again and again till the end of time if that's what it took to keep her by his side. Now his sisters...he'd killed his own sisters...he...murdered them violently with a mocking grin on his face...

Ichigo yelled out in anguish and frustration. Why wasn't he strong enough to protect them? All he ever wanted was to be able to protect them...all he ever wanted was for them to be happy...but in the end he only caused them pain...he was what they needed to be protected them from. He needed to fix this quick before he did more damage...

_"If I die..."_

What was he supposed to do?! How was the hollow so much stronger? Wasn't the hollow just part of him? It didn't make sense...how could he defeat that...but wait...the hollow was just part of him, so then there was a way...that might just work...

_"...you die."_

-------------------------------------

There was beautiful, young woman with long, plum colored hair, and dark skin wandering through the empty streets. This was the deserted city of Nakushite; an old place only a few miles from the edge of Kakura town. The main highway used to come through here but it was now blocked by a large padlocked gate with a large, florescent yellow sing that warned of possibility that toxic waste materials still might be infecting the area. The dark, boarded windows gave her an eerie feeling of being whatched.

Yoruichi was following Orihime's reiatsu...though Orihime's reason for being here was hard to grasp, this place was creepy. When she had returned with Tessai Urahara asked her to immediately begin looking for Orihime and Rukia. Apparently they were missing...that's all she was told.

Yuroichi looked up at the dark sky, still dreary with rain clouds. It had to be almost morning. Hopefully they'd be able to get out of there before it started raining again, mixing with the thick smog that hung over this place it couldn't be healthy in the least. By now Urahara must be done there, they'd probably have begun searching too in a little while.

_I wonder...what's going on...I can feel some creepy reiastu lingering in this place..._

She focused onto Orihime's location, she was nearby. With a sudden rush of anticipation Yoruichi flashed to the exact position.

Orihime jumped, startled at Yoruichi's sudden appearance. Though when she realized who it was she smiled sleepily, _Thank goodness, I don't know if I could go any farther._

Yoruichi frowned disapprovingly, Orihime was hunched over, carrying something on her back. Her left arm held Ichigo's enormous Zanpaktou, with which she seemed to be struggling just to hold up off the ground. She was really tired and looked like she might fall over at any momment. Yoruichi hurried over to help her remove the stuff, she gasped realizing she was carrying Rukia on her back.

"I didn't sense her spirit energy at all!" Yoruichi declared not really thinking, she lifted the body off Orihime's back. Then she noticed it...blood...there was so much blood...before she could ask or say anything Orihime confirmed it for her;

"R-Rukia's dead." Yoruichi was surprised, an immediate shadow of realized sorrow covering her face, sorry she'd been careless enough not to see this sooner.

"D-d-do...do you know where Kurosaki-kun is?" Orihime asked, handing over the sword as well.

"Ichigo's fine, he's at his family's clinic, Urahara's taking care of him. Apparently he was injured rather badly but didn't want us to know for some reason...that boys strange...do you know what happened?"

Orihime couldn't help but feel a little...sad. _If I was Rukia, would you have come back to me?_ She told Yoruichi everything she knew, Yoruichi only frowned and muttered something about needing to talk to Urahara. She hoisted Orihime onto her own back, somehow managing to hold both Rukia and Zangetsu too, and used her flash step to appear as far down the road as she could, it was hard to go very far, very fast with all this exta weight. She had to get back, fast.

----------

The rain had stopped, a low fog hung over the suburbs of Kakura. The grass was damp, he was damp. How long had it been? An hour? Two hours? The sun peeked out of the corner of the sky, slowly lightening the world. It would have been beautiful, so crispy and fresh with the smell of rain, if he hadn't kneeled there, unmoving in his world of dismal. Silently repeating _you killed them..you killed them... _over and over in his mind; torturing himself to hopefully lessen his pain, if only by a little bit. From moving so much some of his wounds had reopened, the blood spreading out in a spiderweb-ish fashion through his soaking bandages.

Ichigo hadn't moved from that spot, not daring to even try. He clasped his broken arm that hung limply at his side; another token of his faults. He didn't know what had happened to his father, he could really see, he couldn't really hear; he was lost in his own world.

Isshin Kurosaki watched his son from afar, trying to making sure that he was completely sane before approaching. Ichigo didn't move or make any sign of noticing his father who knelt down at his side. His son had always been someone who's grounds he didn't dare to tread on; knowing it was littered with mines. In that wayed he'd always been horrible, disregarding his sons feelings. It might even be his fault his son had become so closed off. He just didn't know how to deal with things like this, so he had put it off as long as he could, he knew if he dodged around it this time there might not be another chance.

"Your sisters are going to be fine." Isshin stated after a while. Ichigo felt a great wave of relief, they were okay. For a second he felt like he wanted to go see them...but then he realized that they probably didn't want to be around him after what he'd done, what he'd almost done. The two sat in quite, starring at the ground.

"You can see me..." Ichigo trailed off, not removing his somber gaze from the moist blanket of grass.

"...yeah." Isshin replied rather simply.

"...what...what was that?" He hoped he wasn't digging to far to fast. Ichigo lowered his head a little. He was glad that his father had stopped him, but he didn't really feel like he could explain it to his father...his father who he hadn't really ever told anything to.

"..." He tried to find what to say but he couldn't. Isshin waited patiently but he didn't get a reply.

"Come on, let's get you cleaned up." Isshin said, standing up and offering his hand to help his son. Ichigo still didn't look at him, still didn't remove his eyes from his patch of grass. "If we don't fix that arm of yours, it will heal that way. Besides, there's someone here that would like to speak with you."

He got no response.

"Ichigo! Hey, come in side."

But his son wouldn't answer. Had he returned to the dark abyss of guilt? The truth was that Ichigo couldn't hear his father anymore, any words spoken were drowned out by the ridiculing laugh of his hollow. _You're an idiot, Ichigo! You finally have a chance to ask for help and you give it away! Even when you know that you're to weak to defeat me. How foolish! You'll pay for your arrogance._

Ichigo wanted to move, on some level at least, but his body wouldn't let him. He knew he wasn't even sure what he'd do if he could move, the world was a mess around him. It was hard to tell exactly where he was; the grass of their sixth-of-an-acre lawn would change to the blue sided building of the city inside his head and then constantly change back. He ached, he wanted to sleep, but he wouldn't let himself.

Karin peeked out the door of the kitchen, her broken arm casted; "Dad, Yuzu's waking up!" She shouted, her vioce becoming quiter upon seeing her brother. He just looked so..pitiful. She wanted to go to him, to comfort him, but she couldn't; she was too afraid. She was shaking just thinking about it. Isshin stood up, rubbing his son's briliant orange hair, before making his way to the door. He walked by as Karin just gaped at her brother. He laid a hand on her shoulder.

"Try to realize that he never would willingly do that to you." He said before going into the house. Karin tried to build up enough courage to go over and talk to him, she knew that that hadn't been him. But the possiblity that he might do something again scared her too much. She didn't think she could face him after the fear she had felt. Even if it was his fault, if it wasn't, she knew what he was doing in this moment; he had blamed everything on himself and was now trying to push past it; choke it down. But what he had done...was so horrible...and could have been so much worse, it seemed impossible that he could hide it away in the little space his heart had left.

She stepped foreward, struggling with herself, but she just couldn't do it. _I'm sorry, Ichi-nii_, She turned around and went back into the house, shutting the door behind her.

---------------------------------------------------

**Chapter 6 Complete. -sad face- Uuu...this took a lot longer to write than I had been hoping. Plus my internet went out so I might not be able to submit it for a while...**

**I know the end wasn't really cliffhanger-ish, sorry about that. This was my longest chapter so far!--**

**Hopefullly I'll have chapter 7 out in a couple of days! I apologize about Isshin's and Shirosaki-kun fight, I'm not too good with hand-to-hand combat. I will be bringing in some more characters within the next couple chapters, so you can look foreward to that. I try to keep the characters...well...in character, but it's hard sometimes. A lot of character reaction is simply based of off observations...**

**- Shiro-san**


	7. Chapter 7

**- I can't help but feel messed something up in the last chapter, hopefully I'll be able to recover anything lost in this one. I apologize if this is a bit later than usual**** I can't seem to be able to decide w****hat else to say so-**

**Yay! Thank you guys for the reviews!**

**Ze Deisclaimour: I don't own Bleach.**

------------------------------------------------------

Ichigo didn't see her but he could feel her fear, it wracked the air around him and grabbed at his heart like an icey hand. It couldn't stay this way, they'd always be afraid of him after this. They had good reason to be... he had to take care of this as soon as possible. He had known for a while, sitting there, what he was going to have to do; it seemed like the only answer that would ensure no one else got hurt. But he needed Zangetsu...he needed to get back to Nakushite...he needed to leave.

Knowing full well that the way there would probably be painful, but not so much as last time, Ichigo tryed to force his body up. He pushed up with all his might, trying to break free of his gloomy shackles, he managed to his feet. It was as if he'd just emerged from icey water, he was shaking and trying to move, focusing only on the task at hand; moving one foot, then the other.

He willed him self to the gate of the small yard, trembling, he unlock the cold, black, metal hinge. He headed down the road a somber, invisible, ghost; facing his end. He bore bravily into his black abyss, something he knew only held emptiness. He was a spirit, he would not be granted the restful peace of the Soul Society. According to the Shinigami as a spirit he would forget everything and eventually be reincarnated. To him, forgetting was just as good as disappearing, he wouldn't be _him_ anymore, not without his memories. Just as well, he was dangerous, he was a threat to all the people of this world that he had once been able to call his own. Part of him didn't want to disappear, but it was to protect...to protect, knowing that it almost felt destined.

Ichigo wasn't very far down the road when he heard the horrible laughing. _Yo, Ichigo! Don't think that I don't know what you're doing! Do you really think that you can get rid__ of me__ that easily? Self-sacrifice? You coward! Come here and face me!_ Even though he knew that he was in the real world, he was on earth, he felt the hollow grab his head, pulling him back.

Ichigo forced himself foreward, in body and mind he struggled. It felt like he was moving through water...no...it was thicker than that...it was like trying to move through a raging river of syrup. He managed a few steps, trying to get somewhere safe if he lost control, but his legs gave out and he collapsed onto the ground. An angry jolt of pain shot up his broken arm as it smacked into the hard concrete. The world was going black and before he knew it he was flying backwards through the air.

--------

Isshin walked back into the house, he shot an angry look at Urahara, who was making himself at home on their coach. The coach was indeed a nice change from always sitting on the hard, tatami mat floors. Urahara looked back at him, his face free of expression.

"I'm going to need some answers, Urahara, last night he mentioned you. Hang on...I'll be right back." Isshin said, before he turned the corner and climbed up the stairs. Karin came back in, shutting the door softly behind her. She glanced up, catching the eyes of a light-brown haired woman standing by the front door. The girl looked nervous and shy, she had to be about Ichigo's age. This woman wanted to see her brother very badly, though nobody had cared to tell her anything. She just knew that Ichigo was outside, and that something was wrong. Karin's eyes fell to the object leaning against the wall behind the woman; it looked like a giant black and silver buthcer's knife. _That's Ichi-nii's sword... _Just sitting there the weight of the sword had pushed it's tip several inches into their floor.

"Is Kurosaki-kun okay?" Orihime asked.

This girl seemed kind and gentle, Karin wondered if she would be able to help her brother. It was so strange now, as she began realizing just how little she knew, this hidden world of Ichi's seemed to meshing with her own. It had done something to him...twisted him in some horrible way.

"...yeah..." Karin answered, trying to hide the worry in her voice. Orihime turned toward a particular section of the wall, she could feel Ichigo's reiatsu, he was moving for the first time since she'd been there. Urahara seemed to notice it too, he simply raised his fan to cover his face.

"What's a matter?" Karin asked, noticing their expressions. Orihime was about to answer but Urahara cut in.

"It's nothing."

Isshin came back down the stairs, stumbling a bit. He looked to Urahara, they seemed to communicate some how without words, Orihime could tell they were trying to figure out what to do. Their tendency of a commical air was gone, their attention faced souly on the problem at hand.

"Is it really that bad?" Urahara asked, even though he thought that he knew most of it, Rukia was dead, Isshin's son was wounded both mentally and physically, all in all that seemed as bad as it could get. Ichigo's reiatsu, however, there had to be something wrong, it was more then pain, it was something evil. Isshin sighed heavily.

"Yeah, very bad." Isshin headed into the living room, he noticed a black cat curled up next to Urahara's leg. The cat looked up at him then turned to the section of wall Orihime had been staring at, and slinked away. Confused, Karin studied the wall just to make sure she wasn't missing something. Why did they keep looking over there?

"Karin, please go play in you're bedroom, Daddy's got to talk with this man." Isshin said, his voice more commanding and powerful then usual.

"But-" Karin protested, her father shoot her an look, not angry or annoyed, just warning her that he wasn't in the mood to be argued with. Skulking, Karin climbed up the stairs towards her room. After she had disappeared around the corner the others found it safe to talk again, though they didn't realize she was waiting just out of sight to see what they would say. She tried to quite her breath so they wouldn't hear her, her heart beating loud and fast in her chest. Finally they spoke.

"What about Inoue-san?" She heard her father asked. Their was a moment of silence during which they seemed to be contemplating.

"May I go speak to Kurosaki-kun?" Orihime asked, the shyness showing through her quivering voice.

"No, I don't think it's safe for you two to be alone." Her father cut in instantly. Orihime mummbled some complaint of confusion and disappiontment that Karin couldn't quite catch. Then the man with the stripped hat spoke:

"Let her stay, Isshin. I think she deserve to know what's going on."

There was a quiet agreement and more silence before the man spoke again;

"The start of this whole thing, as I've heard from what Yoruichi told me of what Inoue told her, yesterday Kurosaki-san and Kuchiki-san went to take care of the arrancar that appeared in Nakushite. After a while Inoue-san," He inclined his head to where she had taken a seat. "Went to check on them. By the time she got there Kuchiki-san was dead." The shock held in the air, Karin couldn't see her father's reaction but she felt a numbness beginning to grow in her heart. Rukia had only been with them for a couple weeks, but she was like their sister, and now she was...dead? Karin clenched the front of her shirt, her knuckles turned white as a steady stream of tears fell to the ground. The man continued:

"Kurosaki-kun was with her, he was definetly upset...and he kept saying strange things... Inoue got scared and ran...when she came back he was gone. Yoruichi brought them back, we examined the body. I don't know what's going on but...what Rukia died from were sword wounds that were stiffled by the reiatsu of your son." He paused again to let them take it in. Karin gasped, quickly covering her mouth_...what he was saying...what he was saying...Ichi-nii killed her? He...he wouldn't have killed her...he wouldn't have... but last night, was it like last night? He was going to kill us too...that couldn't have been him...that couldn't have been Ichi-nii._ She trembled, trying not to make a sound.

"Last night he came here, instead of to me. I think he knew we'd be able to find out. He was running away...what happened last night?" Her father's sighed that followed was deep and sorrowful, not like she'd ever heard from him before. She sat as he rectulacted the previous nights details, by the time he was done she could tell that the woman was crying.

"Kurosaki-kun wouldn't do that, Kurosaki-kun wouldn't try to hurt anyone, not his family, and definetly not Rukia." She cried, Karin was slightly glad she had said that, his friends would hopefully also recognize that something was going on.

"You said he was wearing a mask?" The Stripped-Hat man asked. When her father agreed she heard the Strippd-Hat man sigh a bit, then reposition himself on the coach.

"When Kuchiki-san was being taken back to Soul Society Kurosaki-san's Soul Sleep and Soul Chamber were destroyed by Byakuya. In order for him to recover his Shinigami powers I cut his Chain of Fate, but he wasn't able to suceed within the time limit, he had already begin turning into a hollow before he managed to pull through. There wasn't any evident sign that anything had gone wrong except for, as Yoruichi told me, he was nearly killed by Zaraki Kenpachi; the thing that had saved his life was a mask, one resembling that of a hollow's, inside of his shihakushyou. He claimed that the same mask had saved his life when he fought Abarai Renji but it was thrown into the sewers of the Seireitei." Urahara revealed, that information had so far gone by without their knowledge. No one there had really heard any of that. Karin tried calming herself, so they wouldn't hear her. _Neary killed...how many times have you been nearly killed, Ichi-nii? How have you gone through all this, keeping us in the dark all this time? I'm starting to feel as if I don't even know __you__ anymore..._ She heard a loud crash in the living room.

"How come you never told me that, Urahara? Why didn't you do anything when the mask first came up?" Isshin shouted, this was the first time she'd ever seen him mad. That might've been why he didn't want her there; their parents had never let their children see them angry or upset. Karin squeezed her eyes shut, she sat there confused and heart-torn trying to figure it out. The air in there was thick with tension, nonetheless Isshin seemed to have sat back down.

"You do realize what this means?" The Stripped-Hat man asked after giving Isshin time to calm down. Karin was a bit upset that he didn't even offer an apology (at least not one that she had heard). "Yoruichi and I are going to have to inform the Seireitei of Kuchiki-san's death, if we don't tell them what happened it will be found out any way and it will look to be even more of our fault if we try to hide it. But regardless after they examine her it is inevitable that they will figure it out. After that they will abandon your son, that is if we are lucky, some of the Shinigami are his friends but to Captain-Commander Yamamoto he is just a valuable tool for war. If it seems too bad they will not hesitate to kill him-" After that Karin had heard enough, she snuck back to her room, her head too full to do anything but sit on the edge of her bed and think. Yuzu was curled up, snoring softly.

Karin unconsciously rubbed her cast, frowning at the ground. _Ichi-nii killed Rukia-chan...because of some hollow thing...those are the monsters...right? Then he almost killed us...and if they find out...when they find out...they'll probably kill him...even if he's not doing it on purpose...poor Ichi-nii... I know he really loved Rukia...it was horrible for him after Mom died...I don't think he could take another blow like that. I can't imagine how bad he must be hurting right now..._

----------

The small black cat crept down the street towards the mass of black, white, and red that lay there. Yoruichi lightly batted at his nose to see if he'd open his eyes...but he didn't. Perhaps he was unconscious? She was sure he wasn't dead, his reiatsu made that obvious; it was fluctiuating like crazy. She laid next to him, trying to decide her best choice of action.

She hadn't been there for more than a minute when a young girl with short black hair came wandering down the road. She was wearing a grey highschool uniform, and she had a retracted umbrella that she swung around pointlessly by the handle. At first the girl stared up at the cloudy sky, seemingly in deep thought. It surprised Yoruichi when the girl noticed Ichigo laying on the ground. A lot of people in this town seemed to be able to see, it was very unusually.

The girl instantly dropped her umbrella and ran to his side. Her bare knees scrapped against the rugged ashfault as she dropped down next to him.

"...Ichigo...what happened...?" She asked, checking his pulse. After a while the woman seemed satisfied that he was still alive and she relaxed a little, not noticing the strange black cat watching her in the least.

"You're hurt...but what do can I do when you're like this? People can't really see you...what do I do...what do I do?" The girls hands glided around in the air above him, trying to decide what she should do. She kept looking down the street at his house, and muttering things, her face plastered with worry.

"I know!" She said finally. "I think Orihime is in on whatever you do... she'll know where I should take you...hang on...I'll go get her." She stood up and started to run back the way she came but then she stopped herself.

"I can't just leave him here..." She came back, bent down, and scooped him onto her shoulder. "Oh my god, you're heavey!" She gasped, struggling to carry him with her. His body was wet, water accompanied by another warmer liquid that made her spine tingle knowing that it was slowly soaking through her clothes too; his blood. Yoruichi patted along behind her, not caring to cut in simply out of curiosity.

-------

Blackness formed into colors and textures as he realized he was being pelted with rain. Ichigo hardly had a chance to study his surroundings when he crashed into the side of one of the large, blue-tinted sky-scrappers. His heart was pounding, he was panicking. He pulled himself forward through the empty office's till he could see out side again, his back aching from the harsh impact. Standing on the wall of the last lonely office he stared out at the remaints of his world. The storm was definetly worse than it had been last time; the raindrops felt like little paint balls and bruised when they hit bare skin, occasionally lightning would flash down and strike one of the buildings. The buildings looked like the ones in Nakushite, crumbling and falling apart.

"You shouldn't space off like that." Teased the voice he knew belonged the hollow, Ichigo didn't have enough time to register what the hollow had said before he recieved a hard punch in the stomach. He doubled over, his feet off the ground from the force, he turned to see the insane grin of his white dopleganger. The hollow was drawing his sword, an inverted clone of Ichigo's Zangetsu. Ready to strike down his opponent, he swung.

---------------------------------------------

**Yatta for another chapter! Good ending? Poor Ichi-nii! Live Ichi! Live Ichi! XD My anologies are pwnsome; a raging river of syrup.**

**I apologize for my description-lacking writing style, I try though.**

**So...yeah, I hope you enjoyed! I'll be working on the next chapter and it will hopefully be up shortly!**

**-Anata no Shiro**


	8. Chapter 8

**Yoa! Kore wa Shiro! Sorry for the wait, Mina-Mina. This is chapter...8? Yes, 8. Pretty good so far, definetly getting somewhere. Mmm, tasty angsty air, the tensity of it can be so thick I can eat it like soup...more so in real life though... Well I guess I should cut to the story...poor Ichi-nii needs his nakama...TT**

**I don't think I'll bring back Rukia, it reeks too much of that Disney stuff; the person hardly ever actually dies. I always get so annoyed when they bring them back...that's probably one of the only things I don't like about Bleach; No One EVER Actually Dies. I'll only hold off on killing (or pretend to kill but then bring back) a character if I figure out a way for their death to cause more pain to others later on in the story...**

**What's this?! It's...It's...It's a Disclaimer! OMG! Let's read it! Read it! Read it! Read it! It says..."I don't own Bleach"...how sad...but how true. **

----------------------------------------------------------

The chatter died away as the teacher took her place at the front of the class, she pulled out a clip board and began check for attendence. Yasutora Sado sat at his desk, which was a slight bit too small for him, lightly tapping his finger on the table worriedly. Since Yesterday when everyone left he hadn't heard anything. He was hoping everyone was alright. He was going to skip today to look for them but decided to stay incase they showed up.

"Kurosaki-san isn't here again, and neither is Inoue-san..." The teacher said, frowning at the empty seats. Of course Ishida wasn't there, but he'd been gone for over a week, and neither was Arisawa, that was strange but probably nothing to worry about. _What are those kids up too? They're always together...leaving together...lately they've been missing school and coming back injured. I hope they're not getting into trouble...they're good kids...but there has to be something going on. _She thought, then realized that Yasutora was there, wasn't he usually with them? Maybe this was her chance to figure it out!

"Yasutora-san!" She barked, a little more harshly then she'd been intending. He looked at her, his wavey hair covering one of his eyes like it often did. "Do you know where Kurosaki-san is?"

"No." He answered truthfully and simply. The teacher sighed, turning to the black board annoyed. Of course, he wouldn't tell on his friends. Sado watched the teacher's upset expressions, he couldn't help but feel a little left out, but mostly he was worried. _Ichigo's getting too full of himself, he won't depend on any of us anymore, but because of that he can't believe in us either. He is getting so much stronger than any of us...but with it he's taking the whole burden onto himself. He's setting himself of for destuction because eventually that weight is going to crush him...we're supposed to be his nakama...why can't he let us help him..._

"Please take out you're copies of _On the Bent of Grey_ and turn to page 348." The teacher commanded. It was instantly followed by the rustling of pages and shuffling of students searching in their back-packs. Hidden somewhere under the noise was a light knocking sound. The teacher was unsure she had heard anything but several of the students seemed to be eyeing the door confused. The teacher walked over and opend it just to make sure, and sure enough there was someone there; a small, very shy, very nervous looking girl. She looked like she should be in 6th grade...her black hair was in pig-tails except for the two strands of bangs that hung down in a strange fashion.

"Y-yes?" The teacher finally asked.

"...I-I would, please, like to talk to...Yasutora-san..." She stuttered worriedly, like a child about to recieve a scolding. The teacher almost fell forward _Guah?! So they came back for him..._ the teacher slowly turned, shooting Yasutora a "LEAVE AND I WILL KILL YOU" type of look. But, ah!, another chance to figure out exactly what was going on with these students. She smiled a sweet, fake smile.

"Why do you need him? He's in class right now so you need a good reason if you want him to leave." She said, the sugar in her vioce faltering ever so slightly. Ururu panicked; _He never told me what to say if they asked... _In the end she decided to use the truth, being such a good hearted little girl she could bring herself to find a decent lie, but of course she didn't have to say everything, just enough to get him. And since he was right there, she just needed to make sure that he understood that this was very important, even though she han't been told very much herself.

"Kisuke-san needs to see him," Ururu turned so she was looking at Sado. "Kurosaki-san is in trouble." Instantly Sado stood up and walked over to the door, everyone in class was now paying attention. He pushed past the teacher and walked out the door, Ururu bowed before she turned to follow him but the teacher grabbed her arm; Sado stopped as well, turning around.

"Please, what's going on?" She asked her vioce and features displaying nothing but pure worry. "Is he okay?" Ururu lowered her gaze from the teachers eye, frightened tears starting to bubble up. Watching Ururu's reaction made Sado's heart jump, was it bad? It had to be bad for Urahara to call him out of school.

"Is he going be okay? Where is he?!" The teacher said, her voice slowly raising. She recieved no answers, frustration built up inside her and it look like she might explode, but she just let go of Ururu's arm and looked at them sadly. "It's okay to ask an adult for help. You guys are kids, you don't have to everything by yourself." The two nodded slightly before running off, the teacher watched them for a moment then turned back to the class. To her suprise one of her students, Asano Keigo, was standing up, gawking at her in disbelief.

"You're just going to let them go like that?" He asked, of course everyone else, knowing his usual behavior, expected it to be about her 'unfairness', regardless that they'd all heard the whole thing. The teacher looked at him, confused, hoping he didn't mean what she thought he meant.

"W-what do you mean?"

"You heard what she said! Ichigo's in trouble and you just-"

"Exactly, she said he was in trouble...that's perfectly normal for his age...he probably borrowed the car without asking or something."

"Have you not seen him lately!?" The classes attention was now solely focused on him, it wasn't very usualy for him act like this. His expression was pained. "Have you not seen him lately? Have you not seen how he keeps missing class and coming back all bandaged up? Have you not noticed how diffrent he's been acting? You're the teacher, aren't you? Shouldn't you try to help him? Isn't that what you just said?! He's not the type of person who asks for help, not even from his friends! You can't expect that to suddenly change, as an adult shouldn't you try to help him? Y-you can't just keep letting them try to get by on their own...one of these times he's not going to make it back..."

The class watched her, expectantly. She hadn't even moved when the door suddenly slid open. Tatsuki was standing there, panting heavily. She scanned the classroom for several particular students, all of whom weren't there.

"Where's Orihime?" Tatsuki asked, only recieving shrugs from the class. "Do any of you know where any of Kurosaki's group is?!"

"You just missed Sado-kun." Mizuru said.

"Do you know what's going on with Kurosaki-san?" Asked one of the girls. She only muttered a "yeah" before running back down the hall, shouts from the teacher and students following her.

----------

The hollow swung his Zangetsu at Ichigo, who wasn't thinking very clearly because he knew he'd left his sword else where he didn't realize that it was strapped to his back. He knew this could be a fatal mistake but he went for it anyway, he caught the hollow's blade with his bare hands, the edge intantly sunk deep into his palms from the force. He had been pushed back onto the ground, now kneeling and trying to hold back the sword. The blood dripping from his hands down the blade and onto the office wall. The hollow laughed at his bravery and drew it back.

In that moment Ichigo had realized two things, his wounds (and broken arm) from the other day were completely gone, the top of his shihakushyou was back and perfectly reparied, and that the weight he felt on his back was indeed his Zangetsu. He reached up over his shoulder, grasping the hilt and welcoming the nice, familiar feeling. Ichigo pulled forth his own zanpaktou and tried to attack the hollow back, any force put into his swing was lost as the weight of the sword in his hands burned them with a hellish fury that he couldn't bare. He dropped it.

"Weakling." The hollow spat. Ichigo barely managed to dodge as the inverted Zangetsu crashed down where he had been. The hollow appeared behind him, grabbing him by the scruff of his shihakushyou, the dopleganger threw Ichigo out of the office and into the rain. He couldn't help but wince as the water battered at him.

"I am disappointed, Ichigo." Said a familiar voice, Ichigo managed to land on his feet on the side of one of the sky-scrapers. He looked up towards the rain at the figure standing there; Old Man Zangetsu.

"I'm sorry for leaving you." Ichigo appologized instantly.

"That's not the problem though, is it?" Zangetsu asked, his voice booming with power but not rage. "You're a letting fear control you, Ichigo. You're letting greif destroy you. Be strong and take charge, if you want to protect you're friends, don't run, stand and fight!" He realized Zangetsu was holding the sword he had dropped back in the office, Zangetsu tossed it to him, he caught it but not as easily as he would've liked. The hollow landed infront of him, laughing again.

Ichigo ran at him, ignoring the fact that his hands felt like they were going to fall off, his fear of pain gone, Zangetsu was right, he had to protect. The hollow spun his own sword by the bandage on the hilt, he threw it. Ichigo dodged off to the side, approaching the hollow fast he swung-

Everything was slow...

He was going to hit...

He was going to win...

He caught the widening grin on the hollows face...

Ichigo had left an opening...

The hollows hand speed towards him, fear filled his heart again as the hand punctured his chest like a bullet...

He watched in horror as his Zangetsu shattered into millions of pieces and fell with rain to the empty streets bellow. He had let fear take him again, he was...weak...unworthy of sporting his own zanpaktou, unworthy of his own body, unworthy of his strength.

The hollow drew back his hand, looking at blood in interest and slight disgust. Ichigo felt blood dribbling down from his mouth as well, he glared at the hollow.

"You hurt any of them and I'll kill you."

"You're really not in the place to be saying such things, Ichigo." The hollow laughed, he elbowed Ichigo in the face. Ichigo fell back onto the ground in an almost sitting position, his nose felt broken. "I don't know that I can kill you in this place, but that almost makes it better!" He brought forth his sword, twriled it until in was facing straight down, and drove it through Ichigo's shin and into the brick of the building, pinning him there.

Ichigo slammed his back onto ground, wrenching in pain.

"This way I can slice you into pieces for the fun of it, whenever I feel like it." He walked over and bent down next to Ichigo's head, frowning. "You're no fun anymore. Like a broken toy, you're just trash. How come you can't even put up a decent fight anymore?"

"Shut up!" Ichigo shouted, still in pain. He reached forward, grabbed the blade, he pulled. He pulled and pulled and pulled before he finally got it to budge. The sword slipped out easily, he clenched his teeth as it slipped out through the wound in his leg. He was planning on attacking the hollow with it but the hollow ripped it from his grasp and kicked him back.

"Nice attempt, but you're too weak to defeat me, as you always will be, don't think that a little more will power is going to change anything."

-------

Feeling returned, the air was dry, it was warm...almost comfortable...Ichigo suddenly sat up, almost as if out of fear he was still in the Hollows range he scooted back on his elbow until he hit the wall, the amount of movement stung his broken arm. When he hit it the feeling of something solid and hard to support him calmed his heart. He stared up at the ceiling trying to regain his composer, his breathing was heavy, his heart beating like a galloping horse, he felt as if he were soaking in a pool of sweat. He was in a dark bedroom, and seemd to have been laying on a bed made of blankets and pillows on the floor. There was a nicely made bed in the corner, a large wooden desk that's legs were shelfs crammed with novels, mangas, and who-knew-what else, there was a punching bag hanging beside him. There were several posters on the walls but he couldn't make out what they were of. He'd been here before, a couple times... There was a lit candle in the middle of the room. Her sleepy features lit up, Tatsuki sat on the other side of it, her back against one of the desk's legs. He could still feel his heart...his head...his whole body pounding...this fear...he had to get rid of this fear...it was dangerous... he couldn't be here...

"...Ichigo." Tatsuki said, her voice showing exactly how tired she was. She straightened up, staring hard just to make sure she wasn't seeing things.

"Are you okay?" Ichigo asked, his hand shooting up to his face, just to make sure there wasn't any mask. Tatsuki laughed a little, a clear bit of sadness hidden in there.

"It's been a long time since I've seen you look like that...w-why are you worried about me? You should worry about yourself." Tatsuki walked across the room and bent down infront of him. He replaced his expression, surprisingly easily, with his usual scowl.

"Idiot, Tasuki, you need to be more careful." He said, his voice a little too angry sounding. Tatsuki stared at him like she was about to explode.

"Be careful! Be careful?!" She shouted. "What the heck are you thinking?! I-I found you face down on the road! Instead of pretending you don't know what happened why don't offer me an explination! You no-good, dirty, rotten, sorry excuse of a-" There was a quiet knocking as her bedroom door swung open, two very worried, very sleepy looking parents staring at her. They looked around the room, their eyes carefully studying every little knok and crany, then back at her.

"What are you doing?" Her mother asked suspiciously. Tatsuki shot a glare at Ichigo who averted her eyes.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't sleep so I was practicing." Tatsuki said with a fake air of guilt as she lightly patted the punching bag. Her parents eyed her unsuredly, but in the end they bought it.

"Okay, just be quieter please." He father said as the shut the door. They were silent until they heard the footsteps fade down the hall. Tatsuki turned back around, he expected her to still be mad, but she only seemed worried.

"I bought you some taiyaki, incase you were hungry when you woke up." She said, nodding to a paper bag by where she had been sitting. "It'll be cold by now but it should still be good." Of course there were millions of things that she wanted to ask him, millions of things she wanted to say or to do, but she had decided that maybe now wasn't the best time.

"...I'm sorry, Tatsuki, thanks for taking care of me, but I really should go..." He recieved a hard bang on the top of the head.

"You're so freakin' arrogant. What's wrong with getting help every once in a while? Did you know that I searched all day to find Orihime...I even looked for Sado. Because I thought they could help you. I bought you food, and bandages. I sat there for nearly seven hours trying to keep you're fever down, worrying about you, praying that you were going to be all right, and you can't even talk to me. You just have to go, don't you? Just leave me here stranded and confused without saying anything. I want to know what's going on, I want to help you." By now Tatsuki was almost crying. Ichigo stood up, sliding open the window, much to Tatsuki's dismay. _What am I suppose to tell her? _His eyes fell onto a figure curled up on her bed, a black cat watching him with shining yellow eyes.

"The cat followed me home, it seemed to like you so I let her watch over you while I was out." Tatsuki told him, following his suspicous gaze to the feline. Ichigo's eyes widened in rage.

"Yoruichi!" He growled. The cat stood up, Tatsuki felt a bit confused. "If you know anything then why...why would you let her bring me here!?" Of course she thought he was going crazy or something...he was talking to a cat...but it shocked her even more when the cat opened it's mouth and responded.

"I only know what Orihime told me. Calm down, Ichigo." The cat commanded in a rather manly voice, dispite it's true identity. "This would all be so much easier if you would tell us what's going on and stop running away."

"...Good...Orihime's okay?" He said, ignoring her latter complaints.

"Yes, no thanks to you, you left her in Nakushit-" Now...now Tatsuki was mad...her shock from hearing the cat speak wared away.

"YOU LEFT ORIHIME IN NAKUSHITE?!?!" She shouted.

"Yes, I did." He replied calmly.

"You...w-wha...why?" Tatsuki stuttered confused.

"The same reason I have leave right now." He turned to Yoruichi who was studying him with interest, as if she might find all her answers written somewhere amongst the folds in his clothing. "Thanks again for helping me, both of you." He turned towards the window.

"Stop it, don't you move a muscle." Yoruichi demanded. "What do you think you're doing? Stop running away. Do you realize how many people you're hurting by doing this? Why not have faith and trust in your nakama? If you even consider them your nakama at all." Ichigo ignored her and climbed up onto the window sill, Tatsuki ran over and grabbed his arm.

"Don't go! You can't, I won't let you!" She shouted. _I suddenly got this overwhelming feeling...that if he left...I would never see him again..._ He looked at her, his face angery and annoyed as he shook her off.

"If I stay, I will _kill_ you." He growled in all seriousness. He jump out the window, his spiritual body being light, he land easily on the ground below where he took off running, easily jumping the tall brick wall. Oh, but there it was again, that pain from his various wounds, they were healing but it still hurt so horribly, he slowed nearly to a stop, now quite a distance from her house.

Tatsuki ran out her bedroom door, pounded down the steps, unlocked the front door and took off after him, leaving the door wide open. She just knew in her heart that she couldn't lose him, she couldn't let him disappear again because, as her heart told her, he wouldn't come back this time.

No one was left in the room to whitness the amazing sight as the small black cat rose up and slowly transformed into a woman with long, plum hair.

_You made a wise decision this time, Ichigo. You really don't want me to mess with them that much, weren't you a little harsh back there? Hahaha! _Ichigo grumbled, continueing forward. Tatsuki ran up behind him, seeing he was already having a bit of trouble walking, she stood back watching him for a minute. The hollows laughter filt his head to the point that it felt as if it would burst, he stopped, bending over, grabbing his head from the pain. _You can sense her, can't you? She seems pretty eager to die, shall we have a go at it?_ "Shut up!" Ichigo bellowed, he stopped, realizing something else...this was...it couldn't be...he wasn't really too good with the whole reiatsu thing but he could tell, this was...

"Yoa, shinigami. I came here to beat you up again, but it looks like I'm a little too late for that." Ichigo spun around, standing up in the air behind him, with a mocking grin on his face was GrimmJow Jeagurjaques. He still had the large scar across his chest from their first battle, and his left arm was missing for unknown reasons. GrimmJow's eyes moved from Ichigo down to the young woman standing several feet behind him, then back up. GrimmJow frowned, he didn't want to battle someone weak, if Ichigo was like that he wouldn't get any thrill out of the battle. Should he just beat the shinigami up for the heck of it, keep him alive and finish him off some other time?

"GrimmJow." Ichigo mummbled, as if things could possibly get any worse! At first he just really didn't want to have to deal with the arrancar right then but he felt all his pent up anger trying to come out. It almost felt good to think he'd could take it out on this guy, no need to restrain what-so-ever. He walked forward, grinning a little himself.

"You remember my name, shinigami, I'm impressed." GrimmJow laughed.

"I didn't think you were much for talking! Bring it on!"

"Ichigo, stop!" Tatsuki shouted, unbeknownst to the others she had witnessed Ichigo's previous battle with this guy. Judging by what she saw last time Ichigo was defintely not a match for him, plus this time he was hurt, he didn't even have his sword! There was no way he even had a chance like this..._Why does he have to be so stupid!? He;s going to get himself killed!!_

"You can't even fight, where's the fun in beating up a helpless brat? You don't even have you're sword. Listen to the-" But Ichigo cut him off, ignoring his refusal.

"I don't need a weapon to defeat the likes of you." He looked over his shoulder; "Go home, Tatsuki. Go home, go to bed, forget about all of this and pray that you never see my face again."

His emotions nullifying his pain he ran and lunged into the air, shunpo-ing part of way, he punched GrimmJow hard in the stomach (**what was left of it OO, above the hole**). GrimmJow was knocked back only a couple of inches, he stared at the shinigami in a _what the hell do you think you're doing _sort of way. Of course Ichigo had forgotten that Arrancar have what they refer to as _steel skin_, the punch probably hurt him more than it hurt GrimmJow. Ichigo was just glad that it hadn't broken his arm, then his arms would both be emoble.

"You have a death wish or somethin'?" The Arrancar smirked.

--------------------------

**Chapter 8 End!**

**I'm so mean to Ichi-nii...careful, if you torture him too much he can't recover...horrible ending, I know -cries- sorry guys.**

**Hope you like it! Thank's for the reviews you guys! Hey, sorry for the uber lateness, we've been having internet problems.**

**-Kami-sama no tomodachi wa Shiro**


	9. Chapter 9

**O-kagi-dagi... XP, anyway, my foot's asleep...itai...itai...I can't move... Hey, I'm not much of an artist, new to Photoshop (just starting to get the hang of it), but if any of you are interested I did art for a part in chapter 3-4 ish (forget which it is). Here's the link if you wanted to check it out: http://xshirochanx. Deviant Art! My username, hohoho, who would've guessed? It's xShirochanx, of course, I simply had to use the same thing because I'm picky like that and it's the only name I haven't hated after a few days...I'm really sorry this chapter's so late, I started school again so I'll be a bit busier. Gomen ne!**

**Anyway, time for that disclaimer thing again...**

**hcaelB nwo ton od I :remialcsiD**

--------------------------------------------

Yasutora Sado sat on the hard tatami mats of the Urahara shop, an untouched cup of green tea sitting on the table next to him, it had long since gotten dark. He looked up at Orihime who was sitting across the table from him, her head bent down, staring at the ground. Urahara had just told him everything that they'd figured out. Orihime seemd pretty upset about everything, but then again, who wouldn't be? Their little group had began to feel like a family, she probably felt this more than anyone, having no one left. The troubles they had been through had knotted them together and they grew closer and closer to each other, but now their "family" was crumbling away. For her the gap that was left was already filling up with that familiar loneliness. She never wanted this to end...

"He'll be okay." Sado comforted. Orihime gave him a half-hearted smile.

"...yeah...I just wish we could be with him right now...I hate sitting around here knowing that right now he's probably really sad..." She responed, holding her own half-empty, cup of tea with both her hands as they rested atop her knees. "We all liked Rukia...she was our Nakama...b-but...you've seen how Kurosaki-kun is with her. Just being around her cheered him up..." Sado nodded in agreement.

The Japanese-style door slid open and Urahara walked in the room.

"Okay, several Squad 13 and Squad 4 members will be coming in a little while..." He trailed of, catching their worrisome expressions. "He'll be fine. After I finish up here we can go find him, okay?" Suddenly, they all felt it, the rise in Ichigo's reiatsu, not a very big change in output level, hardly noticable. His reiatsu was pretty much at the same level, because he was hardly able control it, except for when he was battling it would change...especially recently, when he first battled the arrancar the fluctuation was quite large.

"Is he fighting?" Orihime asked fearfully, looking towards the overgrown zanpaktou that stood in the corner. Urahara lowered his head little bit and brought out his fan, flicking it open infront of his face. Surely the boy wasn't stupid enough to pick a fight? What was it, another arrancar?

"Remember, Yoruichi is with him. I have to stay here and take care of the shinigami, if you want you two may go ahead without me-" They instantly stood up, ready to go. "Okay, just remember, if there's an Arrancar try and avoid conflict with it. I'm sure Yoruichi will take care of it, just tell her I'll be there in a little while." Orihime bowed in gratitude as they left. Finally they'd be able to see him! Finally they'd be able to help him! Urahara's words from their previous conversation floated back to her, when they were getting ready to find him; _Remember, it's best not to be alone with him. Stay alert and don't let you're gaurd down. _It sadden her to think that they'd have to treat Ichigo in this way...would he be able to see this? Could she be around him now without being afraid?

----------

The arrancar laughed at the young shinigami's attempt. Certainly this kid couldn't be serious! GrimmJow ran his hand through his bushel of blue hair in thought. What should he do? In their previous battle he had, indeed, sensed potential in the boy...but maybe that was an empty hope, all he had in him. He had promised himself he'd kill the kid after the power he'd displayed...but trying to fight a strong opponent just after you've barely made it out of a battle alive was pretty foolish. At least it looked like the shinigami had been in a battle...his wounds were dressed but the bandages looked old...he sure had will power though, trying to take on GrimmJow JeaqurJaques, either that or he was just plain stupid.

"Come on! Ichigo! Get out of here! Stop trying to provoke him!" Tatsuki shouted. If he wasn't standing in the air too now she would've tried something more physical. Ichigo shook his arm a little, hoping to shake off the pain he had recieved from the punch. What else could he do? There really wasn't anyway to fight like this...he felt useless. He shunpo-ed behind Grimmjow, kicking him in the side.

"Stop! You're gonna get yourself killed!" Tatsuki screamed. GrimmJow turned, swinging his foot around, he kicked Ichigo in the head, sending him crashing into the street.

A lady, her long purple hair flowing behind her, appeared infront of Ichigo, standing between the two protectively. Tatsuki recognized the outfit she was wearing, that was her's...but how...and who in the world was that? The clothes hardly fit her... The lady glanced back at him only for a second, to make sure he was okay.

"Huh? Who are you?" GrimmJow asked.

"Shouhin Yoruichi, I'll be you're opponent." The lady said.

_Yoruichi...wasn't that what Ichigo was calling the cat?_ Tatsuki wondered.

GrimmJow grinned again, this woman felt strong! This should be fun! Then he realized that the woman was no longer on the ground, she was in the air above him. He quickly dodged out of the way, shunpo-ing behind her. A little game of cat and mouse continued on for a little while, neither striking a blow to the other.

Tatsuki ran over to Ichigo who was almost to his feet again. She was about yell at him again but she felt something familiar...

"Kurosaki-kun!" The familiarness shouted. She turned around and watched, stunned as the two figures ran up to them; Orihime and Sado. Ichigo stared off to his side, not looking up at them. Orihime stopped, studying him slowly, _...it must hurt...he looks really bad...Kurosaki-kun...I'm so sorry we weren't there for you..._

"...I'm sorry that I ran away from you." Orihime apologized out loud. Ichigo looked at her with an attempted, entirely fake, smile.

"Don't worry about it, Inoue." He looked up at GrimmJow, a bloodlusting fury burning deep inside him, he didn't remember feeling this way before...was it the hollow's influence? Or maybe it wasn't anger...maybe it was anticipation, the end? He knew he hardly stood a chance...maybe he wanted to fight so bad because if he could get GrimmJow pumped up enough GrimmJow would probably kill him. Then it would be over...finally over...when his life ended, so would the pain.

"Come on, Ichigo, let's leave the Arrancar to Yoruichi. Let's go back to Urahara's." Sado said. Everyone else seemed more then willing, but Ichigo shook his head.

"Let me take care of this guy." He was about to take off, back into the battle but Orihime ran forward and flung herself on him, hugging him. He winced as she came in contact with him. She began crying.

"Don't do this, Kurosaki-kun! I know what you're trying to do! Stop, please! We know what's going on! Urahara-san told us! You don't have to keep running, we can figure it out together-" His form was gone, she was holding onto air, she looked up shocked. He was standing a few feet back, trying hard to catch his breath. In this condition, even shunpo-ing a short distance had almost exhausted him completely. She had gotten so close to him...and then he had realized that he could feel it swellling up inside him. She tried to go towards him, -flash- he was couple more feet back, like a staticy marage. He was bent forward slightly, fighting it had almost paralyzed him. _What's wrong! I thought you wanted to tear him to pieces!!!_

GrimmJow flashed to were he had thought Yoruichi was, but she was already gone. He could feel the excitement bubbling inside him as he recognized her as a worthy opponent. Where was she...? She appeared far back but infront of him, he caught her expression as her eyes widened. He felt it...a strange feeling that came long before the pain, GrimmJow looked to his right, shocked to see the blood that for moments seemed to hover in the air next to him before splattering to the ground. His arm...his other arm...it was _gone_.

"Ha! You're slow!" Mocked a voice. Everyone turned up in the air to their right, there stood their beloved Ichigo, a smirk on his face, holding an unattached arm idly in his unbroken hand. It was hard to see, but Yoruichi saw it, a dark shroud slowly engulfing his eyes. Ichigo squeezed the arm, a light cracking sound filled the silence as he broke the bone to pieces before casually tossing it to the side. He seemed unphased from any of the exhaustion he had been struggling with a few moments before.

"Y-You! I'm going to killl you, Shinigami!" GrimmJow roared, appearing next to Ichigo, who simply blocked anything that was thrown at him.

"You're useless without you're arms, how pitiful!" Ichigo laughed, bit of white began forming the mask on his face. Yoruichi landed on the ground next to Sado.

"What's going on? What happened?" She asked, but before anyone answered she looked up at Ichigo, the mask now complete enough so she could tell what it was. _No way! It can't be! That's the mask from before! That means..._

It was done in seconds, nobody really saw what had happened, GrimmJow came crashing to the ground were he lay, unmoving. His body turned red and black, slowly disenigrating into the air. Ichigo turned to face Yoruichi and the rest of the little group standing, umoving, on the ground. The last little crack in his hollow mask filled up, it was complete.

"I didn't think I could crush you much more than I already have, but look it here, all these people are you're friends, right?! You need to realize that this _love_ you humans treasure so much is the biggest weakness there is! As long as it exists you cannot truely be strong, as long as you hold the tinest speck of it in your heart I will always be the stronger one!" The Hollow snickered, landing on the ground. He froze, his features looked a little shocked, his hand slowly rose up and stopped infront of his masked face. The slight twitching movements were the only signs of the great, internal conflict inside the breaking vessel.

No chants or commands were heared but "Ichigo's" hands shot behind his back. Was it Bakidou? The appearance of greens entered their veiw; Urahara Kisuke. He walked up to the boy, grabbing him by the back of the neck, he stared deep into the hollows eyes.

"If you've noticed he's a lot weaker when the mask is broken. Use that moment to fight." He spoke through the hollow to the boy inside, hoping he could be heard. Swiftly, not wanting to give the hollow a chance to break the bakidou Urahara socked him as hard as he could in the face. The mask cracked and crumbled away, the darkness receding, Ichigo fell forward landing with a thump on the road. Urahara looked back at Yoruichi.

"With someone of his strength you can't hesitate, he could have easily killed all of you right then." He warned her, his voice was strict but she understood that he was concerned, she knew she should have done something but the fact that it was Ichigo...the boy she had trained, the boy she'd taken to Soul Society who was so insanely determined, the boy she'd repeatedly teased with her antics...maybe she'd developed some form of affection for him?

Chad and Orihime ran over to Ichigo's side, he seemed to be back to normal...but his eyes were glazed and the only movement he made was the heavey rise and fall of his chest as his body grasped at the air. With much built up courage Orihime reached forward, running her hand through his vibrant ray of orange. She intended it as a gesture of comfort but she couldn't deny that she'd always longed to do that.

Urahara looked down at Orihime. "You should heal him, with all that moving he'll die fairly shortly." She nodded, a little guilty. She looked down at her poor carrot-headed friend. _Will he ever be the same? How can he even still be alive? When we saw him back there...I saw that look in his eyes...it was almost like he was silently begging someone to kill him. That- _Orihime started trembling as the bright barrier formed around him. _That's just...wrong...he must be in so much pain right now...how can he recover. No matter how much I can repair on the outside, I can't even begin to ease his heart._

"...w-what's all this...what happened...?" Tatsuki asked, finely regaining her composer but still slightly lost for words. Questioning looks were passed between Orihime, Chad, and Urahara. Yoruichi grunted a little in agreement, she, herself, was a little short on information.

"I'd suggest you come back to my shop with us in a moment. You can see him, for taking care of him well we took care of that other stuff you deserve an explanation." He turned to Yoruichi. "I'm not certain how much time we have, but It's not long. If they plan on killing us we should be prepared." Yoruichi was unsettled by this, she hadn't really thought about what the Soul Society would do to them now, Urahara was already banished, he'd already been found out as the creator of the Hyougoku, and this whole thing just reeked of him. If they sentenced him to execution would she, his accomplish, be punished as well? Could she live without her best friend? How were they supposed to get out of it this time? This was bad, really bad.

"Are you guys some sort of criminals or something? Why would they want to kill you?" Tatsuki asked, slightly freaking out. Everything was happening so fast she could hardly process. Urahara gazed at her, his eyes serious, full of mystery and wonder.

"I'm not sure about us but I think now that they definetly will kill Kurosaki-san." He said. Tatsuki literally looked like she had just seen a flying pig or something, the little bit of reality she thought she knew was crumbling away...what reason would they have to kill Ichigo? Is that why he was in such a hurry to leave? But...(she kept returning to the same question)...why?! What did he do?

Urahara continued. "After that it hasn't even been a period of 48 hours and after the inncident he's already lost control two times, at least that we've seen. Handling it only seems to be getting worse and worse, so no matter how valueable Kurosaki-san is to them I think that this will fully outrule anything thing they see in him."

Orihime's shoulder started shacking but no one could see if she was crying, huddled over Ichigo with her back to them. "B-but he helped then with Aizen didn't he, aren't they friends? Didn't we all fight the arrancar together? How could they turn their backs on him...aren't we commrades? Shouldn't they help him?! It just doesn't sound fair!" Tatsuki instinctively bent down to rub her back, trying to comfort her dispirited friend.

"Remember," Urahara said. "Soul Society only does what's best for you humans and the rest of the souls."

The rest of that time they sat in silence. Even though after a point it took a lot out of her to do so, Orihime healed him until he appeared brand new. She pulled off the old, used, bloody bandages, blushing slightly as she did so. She hadn't really ever seen him without his shirt on, at first no one would have ever guessed the strain he was going through. He was so...sculpted and handsome. Of course she would have loved him either way, but this part of him reflected the prince, to her, he'd always been, the prince she'd always dreamed of. But after one took a moment to study him, the tension in his muscles was obvious.

Orihime handed the bandages to Sado, stating that they were trash. Urahara peered over, seeing that she was done. He motioned to Yoruichi who bent down and lifted Ichigo's body onto her back. As of this point no one was sure how conscious he was, his eyes were opened and still sort of glazed, he didn't blink, but he was alive. As Yoruichi began walking, that signaled everyone to start moving out, Sado stood up from the set he had taken on the cold asphalt. Orihime and him followed Yoruichi and Urahara in a small procession back to the shop. Orihime turned around to see Tatsuki standed with a sort of left out and in awe expression.

She held out her hand in offer. "Come on, Tatsuki! It's your choice now if you want to open the door that has appeared before you!" She shouted, remembering what Urahara had said when they'd first gotten into this whole mess. She wasn't really sure if she wanted Tatsuki in on this, it was dangerous and she didn't want Tatsuki to get hurt. _That must be why Ichigo didn't trust us to help him with this...he knew it was dangerous...he didn't want us to get hurt...but by turning his back he hurt both us and himself. I don't want to do that to Tatsuki, I'll leave it up to her to decide. _Sado looked at her skeptically.

Tatsuki hesitated for one second. _It will be dangerous._ But by her better judgement she continued after them.

-------------------------

**Waa, I hope that that was a decent chapter! OMG, so late...I'm so sorry...Shiro hasn't been feeling very well recently, Shiro's Grandparents were visiting this week, started school again, and to top it all off about three-fourths through Shiro suffered from a terrible case of writers block (Sudden urge to speak in third person...). I'd like to thank my Dei-chan (My step-sister, her deviant art account is UchihaHikari) who helped me get past my writers block! Thanks to her it didn't take a month to finish. Hopefully things will start settling down again and I'll be able to get the chapters out more quickly like I had been doing. Thank you for being patient with me, I appreciate it. **

**- Shiro, Ore wa sakidatta!!! **


	10. Chapter 10

**-Bwuahahahaha! Yeah...well...I was messing around and I found the hit count for this fic. -shock- Omg, over 1,000! Jeez, I'm not sure if for here that's good or not...but Thanks Guys!!! Thanks for the reviews...I'd give names but there's always more by the time I'm done and I don't want to be forgetting anyone. Okay, thanks to anyone who's reviewed, favorited, alerted, or even just read the story, and since I can't just give yourself a big hug and understand how much I love you. Lol, I don't mean to scare any of you though, I just really appreciate it. I apologize if this one is late as well, please understand that Shiro is a workaholic and I'm not just being lazy and not writing for you. Seriously, it's a horrible habit, yesterday (the situation might sound weird but I go to one of those online schools): Me: -workworkworkwork- My Mother: Okay! That's enough! Go do something else, it's only 9:00 and you're already stressing over that school work, your math class is in half an hour, take a break until then. Me: D: Nooo! -tislikepunishment-.**

**Hello, I'm the Disclaimer, yup, the Disclaimer, you know...the one that always says Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach? Yeah, that one, how's it going?**

**------------------------------------------------------**

The young, literally red-headed man sat at the end of the table the Soul Society's Woman's Association usually used (although it was currently unoccupied) filling out some papers. It seriously didn't make sense why he had to do all this paperwork! Everone seemed to have dumped it on him...it just didn't feel fair. Why'd they have to return for _this_? Wasn't it dangerous leaving Kakura Town unguarded? Well Ichigo, that Ex-Captain, the Ex- Execution Squad and Special forces captain, and Rukia were still there...and the rest of the group, respectively, he was just unsure of how strong they were so as to whither or not they'd be any help was uncertain. _Rukia..._He had seen those two together, they were always fighting and teasing each other...but their bond was obvious. It was so strong... but what did that kid have that he didn't? They'd grown up together, he knew her better than Ichigo ever would, he was like family to her...maybe that was it. Maybe he was _just family._ Could he be content being _just family_?

Renji jumped as the door flew open. Hitsugaya was standing there, he was as serious as ever but Renji could see the tiredness behind his eyes. His younger captain looked relieved to find him.

"Good, Abarai, I've finished reporting to Yamamoto and the Technology Bureau. You should finish up your work we're either leaving tomorrow or early in the morning the day after that." He waited a moment to make sure Renji understood before he turned around and walked away, leaving the door slightly ajar. Grumbling, Renji got up to shut it, but he stopped infront of it, realising that there was...another presence; he flung it open.

A quivering, black headed boy stood there, frightened by his sudden actions. It was the Squad 4 kid that had been with Ichigo; Hanatarou Yamada. His looked greatly stressed and worried.

"E-excuse me, Vice-Captain Abarai! I'm so sorry to bother you! Please don't be angry!" He squeaked. Renji tilted his head, staring at Hanatarou in awed annoyance. How could any man stand to behave so disgraceful, and a shinigami nonetheless.

"What do you need?" Renji asked, trying to mask the drug up hate for Squad 4 members that he had left over from his time in the 11th Division. The boy's droopy, depressive eyes some how got droopier and more depressive.

"Vice-Captain Abarai, I understand that you were good friends with Kuchiki Rukia...I thought that maybe it would be better for me to tell you...she's just been brought back..." Hanatarou stuttered, unsure of how to word it. Renji's eye shot wide, _Rukia's back...Rukia's back...?!?! _He pushed past Hanatarou without thinking, he muttered an apology but he was unsure if he had been heard. Rukia was...back? _If that's true then where is her reiatsu? I don't feel it! She can't be back! _

"Vice-Captain Abarai!" The boy shouted. "Wait! ...She's in the 4th division barracks..." But Renji was gone before he could hear the rest. _4th Division b...is she hurt? Please, Rukia! Be okay..._ His attempt to be calm failed, he walked, but he walked as fast as he could, until he finally gave it up and broke into a run. Hurrying down the halls, the rythm of his feet hitting the floor nearly matched that of his heart's. They were matched in a matrimony of distress.

----------

Yoruichi dropped Ichigo onto the tatami's lazily. She figured it didn't matter much anymore since he was all healed, he needed to stop being a baby and stand for himself. Of course part of this was that she just felt angry. She'd been with the boy all day and yet so far no one had offered her a decent explination, and this was bad, if there was a chance she was going to be executed she wanted to know what the heck was going on! As he thumped to the floor Orihime looked up at Yoruichi both disapproving and worried...sort of like _how could you do such a thing_ type of look.

Tessai appeared out of nowhere, he hurried over and swiftly scooped the boy up, carrying him off most likely to get him situated in a room. Orihime wanted to follow after him but she stopped herself, realizing that she once again was forgetting about Tatsuki. It was reasonable though, right? She was in a high stress situation and she couldn't stop worrying, stop thinking about...him...she...loved him so very much. But then a question struck her, _why? _Why did she love him so much that she felt as if her heart would explode? He had been kind to her, he treated her gently and always tried to smile for her...but he'd never returned her affection...so then why had her love for him grown so expenintually? Along with that love there was also a great deal of sympathy that had grown as well. She would never be able to understand him...she knew that very well. She was brought back into reality when some grabbed her arm, she turned. Tatsuki was clinging to her, looking rather confused and even the tiniest bit scared.

"It's okay, Tatsuki, we should go sit down." Orihime said. Everyone else was already seated around the table. She felt sort of embarassed to still be standing there, hurriedly the two girls took their seats.

"Do you recall, only about two months ago, when you were all training to go to Soul Society?" Urahara started his long explanation.

----------

Renji slide open the door, nearly breaking it in his rush, but he stopped, the only sound he could hear was his heart beating in his chest. This was the room he heard they were keeping Rukia in. It was dark...there was only a small, raised table-like bed where there lay a small figure covered in a white blanket, pale, white feet sticking out the bottom. The blanket stretched up from the ankles to the top of the head..._God, please don't let this be her..._is the only thing Renji thought as he approached. He slowly pulled back the blanket, as soon as he saw her face he dropped it as if it were a spider, something disgusting he didn't want to touch.

"No..." Renji gasped, he couldn't remove his eyes from her beautiful, serene, peaceful face. _There's no way...it can't be...it can't be...that's...impossible..._

Eventually curiosity got the best of him, well, it's more like he couldn't make it click in his mind that she was dead so he was simple seeing how. Renji reached down and pulled the covers back a little more, relaxing after seeing that she at least had on a small, white...cocktail dress looking thing...

Her body was _covered_ in cuts of all sizes, her arms, her torso, even a few on her legs. Who would do such a thing? His heart raced. His...sweet...Rukia...how could...who could...rage built up inside him. He silently swore to her that he would kill the one who did this, he would avenge her...but then, he caught something. From her wounds, this reiatsu was Ichigo's...no, he wouldn't have; not after all he went through to save her. Maybe he'd just been with her...his reiatsu was hidden behind something dark, maybe that was it, that was what killed her...but he couldn't deny that it didn't feel like two, it felt like one in the same, intermingled and combined.

There was only one way to find out...

-------

When Urahara had finished the sun had already rose and it was the start of a new day. Although, needless to say, everyone was very tired. Tessai, Ururu, and Jinta went around the back of the shop closing all the blinds to try and make the shop dark as everyone got ready to sleep. Although Orihime and Tatsuki both protested Urahara told them that they'd need the energy for what was to come ahead.

Yoruichi followed the girls down the long hall to one of Urahara's many rooms. Orihime saw that she looked a bit frazzled by all this, her eyes showed that she was both tired and rather stressed. Regardless, all she offered were kind words to the girls, stating that they'd figure things out and everything would be fine before she diappeared out of the room.

Two futons had already been laid out on the floor, made nicely with lots of comfortable pillows and blankets.

"Urahara is a very hospitable person, isn't he?" Orihime said, smiling at Tatsuki. Tatsuki nodded, but didn't smile back.

"...I-is this what you've been up to all this time? All way disappearing with them..." Tatsuki asked, not looking at her friend as they climbed into their beds.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you, Tatsuki, I didn't want you to worry..."

Tatsuki laid back, lefting out a comfortable sigh. The two girls stared up at the ceiling, deep in thought. "So, Ichigo's a shinigami? When did that happen?" Tatsuki asked. Orihime rolled over onto her stomach.

"I'm not entirely sure...I know he got it from Rukia..."

There was that name again, the name Tatsuki felt like she should know...but she didn't... "Who's Rukia?"

Orihime was surprised. How could she not remember Rukia?! But...oh yeah, Tatsuki wouldn't be able to, right? Her memory was erased just like everyone elses... she didn't answer Tatsuki, who eventually gave up on waiting, deciding maybe it was a topic for some other time. Without anything else to do Tatsuki let sleep take her, relieving her eyes of their strain to stay open.

When Orihime was sure that her friend was asleep she carefully got up, slipping out the door. She could feel his presence in the room down the hall, he had been placed several rooms away from everyone else...for reasons she could easily guess. Orihime carefully crept towards it...fearing that even the quietest noise might wake someone up. But she made it there okay, and all that was left was to enter...all she needed to do was to open the door...just open the door...open the door...why couldn't she just open the door? She was afraid of him...she was afraid of being near him, afraid of what might happen..._how can I be so mean to Kurosaki-kun? I can't be afraid...if I'm afraid he might not ever get better..._ for all those times he had put his life on the line for one of them, she would do it for him. She had to do it for him...but she just couldn't open the door!

Her hand trembled but she made herself slide open the door.

The orange headed boy was layed out on a futon, uncovered, his head supported by a small round pillow. He didn't move or make any signs of noticing his visitor. He was still, as she guessed, he had been since being laid there.

Orihime kneeled at Ichigo's side, his wide, blank eyes staring up at the ceiling.

"Kurosaki-kun...what's wrong with you? Why are you like this?" She questioned, concerned. With a slight bit of hope she waved her hand infront of his face. Recieving no reaction she drew her hand back, but jumped, startled, when he reached up grabbed it. His was shaking rather badly, although his hands were strong his hand to hers felt like a small, pleading child.

"What's a matter?" Orihime asked, in gentle voice although she was rather nervous. He faced her, he didn't nessecarrily look at her, but he looked in her general direction. His eyes shot around the space he knew she was, trying to see her. His eyes seemd to see right through her, finally, it seemed, he gave up, shutting his eyes for moment then looking back up at the ceiling.

"...I-it...hurts..." He muttered in response.

"I-I'm sorry! I thought I got all of your wounds! Heheh...where does it hurt?" Though his hand was still shaking he tightened his grip on her hand. It took her a second at first to realize that he was pulling her hand closer. Closer, and closer. She blushed and let out a nevrous squeak as he placed her hand on his chest. _W-What is he doing?!_ Of course he was just a guy...but...so wonderfully sculpted...at first inside she felt like she was going to crash. What was she supposed to do? Remove her hand...or...what?! His hand let go, falling limply at his side.

And then she started crying, the tears sliding down her smoth cheeks before falling onto her lap. Where he had placed her hand was just about where his heart would be, softly beating in his chest.

The truth was that it did hurt, rather badly. The way the hollow abused his body, overusing it without regards to the fact that he had already been horribly worn-out had caused him to become very deeply exhausted, allowing his heart to overwhelm him completely and estinguish all other feeling. Each beat was like a new, fresh wave of pain and guilt, till he felt beaten senseless by the growing agony. He could feel something wet on his skin, was she crying? He couldn't tell...was it because of him? For him? _Aw, you made her cry! How mean. _The hollow teased. He cringed, more weight adding to his already heavey burden, he was hurting his friends, wasn't he? By doing this he was only being a trouble to them...he felt a pressure on his chest. What was going on? He could hardly see...everything looked black...

Orihime had laid her head on him. "It'll be okay, Kurosaki-kun." She whispered to him. _He's always acting so tough, acting like these things don't bother or hurt him. That must be lonely for him to do that...even for once, Kurosaki-kun, let someone bare these feelings with you, let me help you to feel better so you wont just bury it away...if you do that I don't know that a scar that big could heal..._

"Urahara-san is looking for a cure...or something that we could do, while everyone's sleeping...you're going to get better Kurosaki...so, please, just bare with us..."

He could feel her warmth, but he could not hear her words. The feeling...of comfort...that came from that...reminded him of his mother, in that way it lightened his heart. She didn't know that she had helped him, she hoped though, that she had even if it was only a little. Whispering an apology, she got up to go. If they found her in here she would, at the very least, be scolded. They weren't supposed to be alone with him...but this seemed to have gone fine...that encouraged her, and she promised to try visit again later.

After he knew she was gone, Ichigo let out a low groan. He hated hurting them, he hated this pain, he hated these repetitive reminders of his sins. _This is all to friggin' much! I don't want to do this anymore...I give up. _The blackness melted away and he could almost see again...it was...blue... A mix of blue and black was all he could see, no defined shapes, just a blurry mess of color. He felt two arms slip down his shoulders, hanging there lazily. Ice cold skin pressed against his cheek.

"You give up?" The menacing voice whispered in his ear. "I'm disappointed, I was hoping we could play a little more..."

"Will you hurt them?" Ichigo asked.

"Hmm? Hurt them...?" The hollow asked a little confused. "You don't really understand, do you? I am a hollow, I eat souls. Whither I eat them or not depends on whither I feel like it or not...are you changing your mind? Ha. I didn't think you could actually follow through with this...weakling. Well, let me tell you something. I'm sure I will devour plenty of souls during my reign, but do you know who's soul I'll eat first?" The hollow paused a moment.

"...yeah, your's, Mister King. Because if I eat your soul first then you wont ever be able to return to full power, you're spiritual body, and all of your power will be mine."

With that the hollow leaned down and sunk his teeth into Ichigo's shoulder.

-----------

Circular rice-paper doors appeared in the street, invisible to any human eye. They slid open, allowing the red-headed shinigami entrance into the humans world.

--------------------------------------------

**How's that for a chapter? Mwuaha! Well, that should do for an ending... oooo, anyone read the new chapter...OMG OMG OMG I can not wait until Friday...but I guess I do this every week...**

**You know, I want a cute, little, chibi Grimmjow plushie in his released form. It kind of looks weird on the manga but chibi he's so cute! Lol, -sweat drop- yeah...so I hope you like that chapter, thanks so much for the reviews. Hits -le gasp- I'm almost up to 2000!!!**

**Oh-no! My computer's (the one that I usually write on) fan broke so I can use it (less I break it completely) until I can get that fixed...so I have to use my other computer (technically mine but other people use) on which I can usually on get about an hour on a day so writing is going to have to squish in with my freetime D: but I'll try to keep them coming at a decent rate.**

**Last but not least, My goodness, that was slightly IchixHime, wasn't it? Gah, I never thought the day would come! Shiro, writing IchixHime sceens, unbelievable! **

**- Sakidatta Shiro.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Moshi, moshi minna! Yes! I've made it all the way to chapter 11, so I have to be doing good...considering I didn't think I'd even write chapter two. You know what I found yesterday? Shirosaki-kun's Bankai outfit (on ebay)...being the overobsessive bleach fangirl that I am, I of course, had to run in circles (not literally though) and shout "Sugoi!!!!!!!". It looks so cool...if I had a million dollars, you can guess how my house would look... Oh, where I stopped with Ichi-nii and Hichi-nii yesterday I hope that it was a decently close to awesome ending...I hope this chapter is good, a couple things that I've been planning for a while should happen in this chapter...I think...some of it happened in the last chapter too...I just hope I do them justice. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. Which, when you really think about it, I'd rather not because then I couldn't be so utterly obsessed.**

**-----------------------------------------------------------**

Although this spot wasn't the most comfortable place in the world it was at least comfortable enough to get a decent rest. It was quiet, and for now that was all that he really needed. He could feel the sun nearly cooking his skin under his dark, black shihakushyou but he tried to sleep, his back rested against the roofing tiles of the 10th Division Barracks central building. Here hopefully nobody would bother the young taichou...

Hitsugaya knew he over worked himself...this whole captain thing could be overly stressful and very hard, but it was too late to back down now. He'd be going back to the Living World soon enough...

"Histugaya-taichou!" Shouted an urgent voice from behind him. Hitsugaya grudgingly sat up, he turned around to see who it was. A man was crouched at the very top of the roof, a mask that looked merily like a bent board covered his face. "Hitsugaya-taichou, I have an urgent message for you, it has been signed by Captain-Commander Yamamoto of the 1st Division."

"What happened?" Histugaya asked, his annoyance for being bothered melted away, he hadn't gotten an alert like this for a long time...

"My apologies for bothering you with this type of information, sir, but the Captain-Commander thought you might find it's importance worthy of such an urgent delivery. I have two messages for you; the 13th Division, Kakura Town Ambassador, and member of Hitsugaya's Team, Kuchiki Rukia has been brought in and was reported as dead yesterday afternoon-"

"What?!" Hitsugaya interjected, stunned. She was killed while they were back in Soul Society? Had there been more Arrancar attacks since they left? The Captain felt a pang of guilt, Rukia had previously been supposed to return with them but he had pulled a few strings and allowed her to stay. She never said she wanted to stay but he could tell she wanted to... she was staying with that boy that had infilitrated the Seireitei and taken on several Captains and Vice Captains just to save her... especially after that he knew there had to be something between them (well, it was pretty obivous and it would be pretty dull of someone to not see that, no matter how hidden the two might think it is). Apparently letting her stay wasn't the right decision...

"-and," the man continued. "Vice Captain Abarai was reported to have left to the Living World approximately an hour ago." Hitsugaya cursed under his breath, swiftly taking off. _Darn it, Renji! What are you thinking!_ He jumped from roof top to roof top until he reached the tall reaching towers of the 1st Division Barracks. _ I need to find Yamamoto... _

When Hitsugaya finally found the old man in the 1st Division Barracks the Commander didn't seem at all surprised to see him.

"So... you've recieved my message? Maybe my tactics were a little dramatic..." The old man asked. _No, sending someone from the stealth force was not at all dramatic. _Hitsugaya thought sourly.

"Captain-Commander Yamamoto, I request the immediate departure of my team to the Living World, sir." Hitsugaya said as formely as he could manage.

"I'm sorry, Captain, your request is denied."

"But, Captain-Commander, isn't our assisstance needed in Kakaru-"

"For the Arrancar?" He interupted, slight amusement in his voice. "Then you haven't heard, Hitsugaya, the Technology Bureau has been observing the city carefully during your return, there has only been one Arrancar appearance since your arrival in the Soul Society, which was weak and easily dispatched by the Shinigami Representative."

"Kuchiki Rukia's death-" The white haired captain was cut off again.

"We are still investigating the cause of her death. I believe that Vice-Captain Abarai might know something, that is why I also will not allow you to retreive him, he will be punished upon his return but for now let us wait to see what he finds..." The old man stated in an -end of discussion- tone. _Unbelievable! _The 10th Division Captain thought, leaving in disapppointment. _Isn't that using him? _"Wait, Hitsugaya. You should also know that your departure time has been post-poned two days."

----------------

Renji made his way down the streets, reflecting upon his thoughts. They were all jumbled and confusing...Rukia was dead but he refused to believe it...because it wasn't possible. This had to be some illusion. It had to be. Please, oh please let it be. His only lead was Ichigo's reiatsu. Although he hadn't really been part of it from the beginning and he kept getting stuck in Soul Society he hoped that he was part of this family thing they had going on. He'd helped save Rukia... he'd sort of been part of it since then, hadn't he? He would never show it but he'd always hoped that they thought of him as one of them. Of course, although they fought a lot, from that hope of belonging he really didn't want it to turn out to really be Ichigo. For her sake as well. The anger he felt, if it really was him...after how much Rukia had loved him, if he had been so twisted to pull her into that and then kill her...just thinking about it pumped anger through his veins...

Renji arrived infront of Urahara's shop, this was it...could he do it? He had to, he wouldn't be able to live not knowing...

-------------

Ichigo crumbled foreward, unsure how he was standing in the first place. He clenched his shoulder with both his hands. "Wha...what the hell..." He gasped. He stumbled foreward a bit but managed to catch his balance. The hollow started laughing hysterically. _I could feel you regreting it, so I thought it might be fun to play a little more. Seems I scared you pretty bad! But, keep in mind, everything I said is true. Yumm...a soul with such high spiritual power tastes delicous, I can't wait until you do give up._

To afraid to live, to afraid to die, what was he supposed to do?! This freakin' hollow was only making things worse...none of this would have ever happened if that hollow hadn't been there in the first place! _And you wouldn't have rescued that girl._ The hollow reminded him. _That red headed shinigami probably would've killed you, or the spikey headed one, who knows, you might have even managed to ge to the 6th Division Captain without me but you'd definetly be dead right now if I hadn't save you. You should try being a little more greatful._

"...you..." Ichigo growled, but he wasn't really in the mood to argue. He walked foreward a couple feet to the wall, so he could have some support less he fall over just standing there. His shoulder still hurt and he was still very shaken up. His mentality was crumbling and she wasn't there to help him stabilize...he was falling to pieces.

The door to the room slide open unexpectedly, Yoruichi peered in with interest. "So you're alive!" She exclaimed. The several times she'd peeked into check on him he hadn't budged an inch, but now he was standing, his head and shoulder agaisnt the wall, clutching his other shoulder with both his hands. After hearing the whole story she felt a lot more sympathatic for the boy. He looked afraid...all of that confidence and strength he always had was completely gone...the boy was _raw_. Who knew what horrible things his mind had been showing him? Yoruichi took the black bundle out from under her arm and placed it next to the futon.

"That save's me the trouble...you can dress yourself, right? Urahara wanted me to give you this new shihakushyou..." Yoruichi said, sort of feeling uncomfortable and unsure of what she should do. "Um...it's getting pretty late, Tessai's making dinner...if you wanted to join us I'm sure everyone would be glad to see you." She walked back to the door.

"I'm sorry, Ichigo." She said before shutting the door. Yoruichi stood for a moment in the hall, trying not to cry...seeing him like this was painful...knowing that no matter how much they knew they would never really know how all this was to him, she could only guess what it was doing to him...even if he made it through he probably wouldn't ever be the same...

Ichigo stood there, trying to regan his composer, or at least as much composer as he could. His flamboyant, orange hair was matted down with sweat and he couldn't stop shaking... "What...am I supposed to do...Rukia?"

--------------

Orihime twiddled her spoon between her fingers, gazing absent mindly at the bowl of soup infront of her. She was hungry, but she just didn't feel like she could eat... A quiet chatter filled the air around her, but it was stiff. Like they were trying to behave normally, trying, if even for a little bit, to pretend that nothing was wrong. But she couldn't do that...not straight-foreward and not in that beat-around-the-bush way. Nightmares had infested her sleep, as they had most of the residence in Urahara's shop. No one would speak of it but it hung like a dark cloud above their heads, no one would speak of the fear their dreams had filled them with, either for or of the boy.

The sound fell away to silence, Orihime peered up to see why. The bright haired shinigami stood at the entrance to the room, dressed in a new, clean, crisp shihakushyou. He was still avoiding eye contact with all the people that stared up at him. He quietly made his way over to the table and sat down. Tessai hurriedly dished him a bowl of soup, not wanting Ichigo to change his mind. The silence continued as the boy started eating, no one returned to their food, the whole of them were confused on what to do. Was he getting better without them doing anything at all? But if they didn't intervine it might not heal the right way...like a twisted limb, the body will try and heal to ease the pain and make it better, but if no one fixes it it will heal wrong and still be a burden to the end.

"I'm happy you decided to join us, Kurosaki-san." Urahara finally said, breaking up the silence. Ichigo continued eating, not looking at anyone. The air was stiff with tensity.

"Do you like the soup?" Tatsuki asked, choosing her words carefully. She was hoping she could get him to say something, but the boy remained silent. He was partially regreting coming, now, because of what he was and what he had done, every one was nervous and uncomfortable around him. He scraped up the last of his soup, and set his dishes on the table. In desperate attempt to keep him there Orihime quickly jumped up to her feet.

"It was good, wasn't it, Kurosaki-kun?" She said, a sort of pleading to her tone. "It was okay, right?" He looked up at her with another forced smile that shredded her heart to pieces.

"Yeah...thank you." He stood up, not knowing what else to do, he couldn't preserve under this pressure...it was going to crush him. The best thing for now was to get out of here...to think about his best course in action, though his mind contiuely pulled him away and made it seem impossible that he'd ever decide anything at all. Maybe he'd just stay in that room for the rest of his life, wondering, hoping hopeless dreams, rotting away... Everyone in the room shot to their feet, realizing that they were losing him.

"Wait, Ichigo! Please, just sit back down...just stay with everyone for a little while, please, we don't even have to talk about anything serious! You don't even have to talk at all, please just stay!" Tatsuki begged. Though they were silent, everyone's eyes said the same. He felt torn in half, he had tried, he really had...but he saw that thing would never be the same. This was the price that he paid to save Rukia, even though in the end he wasn't meant to have her anyways. Fate was cold and cruel, and it only ever seemed to give him false hope before ripping it away, taking a part of him with it every single time! It just wasn't right... Here were the people that before this was all over he might even kill, and they were asking him to stay with them. That was brave...but staying would hurt them worse than if he left. He should just disconnect himself from all these people, he realized...the hollow only wanted to kill them because Ichigo cared about them...but if he didn't...then they wouldn't be in danger...

Before he could make a decision they all felt the presence that had entered the room, everyone turned to the figure standing in the doorway; Abarai Renji. His eyes were bloodshot and they were wide in shock and fear as he felt Ichigo's reiatsu. It was the same...the reiatsu he'd felt from Rukia's wounds was the _exact _same. That darkness was twisted around and through it, it hadn't just been two reiatsu's overlapping! In one movement he rushed foreward, grabbed Ichigo by the throat, and slammed him up against the wall.

"You killed her!" He growled in a low, menacing voice. "Why?!" Renji truthfully didn't want it to be him, considering that he might even be able to call them friends he told himself that there might be other posssiblilities. As long as Ichigo denied it, he would believe him. But the Reprenstitive Shinigami didn't say anything...Renji felt the pent up emotions ready to explode.

"Why did you kill her!? Why?! Why! Why!" With each 'why' he drew the boy back and slammed him into the wall again, he paused for a moment to give Ichigo a chance to answer...Ichigo glared up at Renji, blood slowly creeping through the hair on the back of his head; he didn't even resist. If Renji killed him now, he truthfully wouldn't mind, it would surely save him a whole lot of trouble, and it would be in revenge for Rukia. Knowing it was true made his words feel like they cut deeper gashes than any sword.

Time seemed to freeze between them as their eyes met, it was like all sounds were muted except for the rapid beating of their hearts. Renji felt a deep sense of dread wash over him as it sunk into his bones, the watery, dark, guiltness that he had seen in his "friends" eyes, it was obvious to him that Ichigo had killed her. It was like his expression was daring him to squeeze a little harder, completely block off the boys air way.

Renji felt someone scoop him up and pull him back and away, he brook out of his mutedness and realized that people around him were shouting. Urahara and Yoruichi were already helping Ichigo up, Tatsuki and Orihime kept asking him if was okay, Tessai, Ururu, and Jinta were standing, gaping and feeling useless. Sado let go of him and he tumbled backwards into the wall behind him where he sat for a moment, watching the commotion. He was in denial still..._no...no...he wouldn't have killed her...t-that's not right...there has to something I missed...he wouldn't have...he wouldn't have...not Rukia..._ He watched as Ichigo quickly tore himself away from the group of people. Ichigo clutched his head and looked like he suddenly got a bad headache, without turning back he ran out of the room. Renji caught the worried expressions that passed between the two former captains before they rushed after him, shouting at everyone to stay put.

What's going on...?

---------------------

Ichigo fell to his knees in his room, clutching his head with both of his hands...trying to supress it... _Ya want me kill him, Ichigo? After hurting you like that he deserves to die, right?! _But no, it wasn't just that...he wasn't trying to take over because of that. The instance he felt everyone surround him was the moment the hollow started pushing up from the depths of his soul. He knew fighting was in the end futile but he had to supress it until he could get away...he had expected the hollow to stop...but it wouldn't. It wasn't like the hollow was trying with all his might, it was like he was just staying under the point at where he could over take Ichigo. Although it would be easy for him to go beyond that, he didn't. Ichigo tried desprately to push him back down but the hollow barely budged, staying at the tip of the iceberg, forcing it a little more every now and then to scare the boy. To the hollow it was just a game, a little playfulness to keep the boy down; to keep him miserable.

-------------------

After a short argumentive conversation, Tessai sent Jinta and Ururu out of the room. Everyone had slowly began to congregate back to their seats to wait, no one said anything to Renji, not knowing if to welcome him or to scold him. They left that up to Urahara to decide. After a short while Urahara and Yoruichi came back in, Urahara was rubbbing his temples in frustration. Yoruichi layed her hand on his shoulder reassuringly.

"Is he alright?" Sado was the first to ask.

"I don't know...Tessai, would you mind keeping an eye on him? I'll fill you in on the details later." Urahara said, sitting down where had been, and dishing himself another bowl of soup. Tessai stood up, bowed, and strood out of the room. Urahara sighed. "Well, I guess I have someone else to explain everything to. Abarai-san, come here."

Renji obeyed and scrambled to the table, not wanting to anger the Former-Captain. If he was capable of creating the Hougyoku, then what else was he capable of doing?

"You are correct, Abarai-san, Ichigo was the one who killed Rukia. Wait, don't be alarmed, I'll explain everything but first I need you to tell me; did you tell anyone about what you found?" Urahara asked. Renji felt extremely nervous, what was he suppose to answer?

"Aaa, no...not at all, Sir." He answered truthfully. Urahara looked relieved. He made his explanation to Renji short, sweet, and simple, ending with "Now we need to decide the best way to deal with this".

"Well you were all sleeping I was doing some research, and I may have found a sollution." He told them, this caught everyone off guard, no one was really thinking that there may actually be _hope_. Smiling at everyones reaction, he continued, holding up a small, black pill. "These were used for several experiments done at the Technology Bureau, they were created in my absence. This pill, if swallowed completely disolves the present soul, leaving the spiritual body behind. Normally after the loss of a soul a spiritual body will slowly disenigrate into spirit particles, as a human body will become earth, but the pill perserves the body and stops any decay from happening. From what I've seen Ichigo's situation seems to be two souls fighting over one body. If that is the case then while the hollow is in control when we give him the pill it should destroy it...however, if I am wrong then it will...kill him."

" I thought we were trying to help him, not kill him! Isn't that too risky?!" Tatsuki protested.

"I know it's dangerous, but what other options do we have at this point?" Urahara asked.

"He's just not strong enough, isn't he? When you guys trained him for Soul Society the results we amazing, can't we just train him until he's strong enough to over take it?" Sado asked. This time it was Yoruichi that responded.

"That would've been a good idea, had we started earlier, but as you have seen he has become incredibly unstable. He can't even be around people anymore without losing it. At this point training him would be suicide."

"Is the pill really the only way?" Orihime squeaked.

"We can't just do nothing," Urahara answered. "If we don't decide what to do things will just keep getting worse and worse. If we don't hurry it might get to the point that there's nothing we can do, the best we can do is try to save him before Soul Society kills him. If this kills him, he'll have been killed in anyway, but if it works then we'll have saved him. Are we at an agreement?"

Slowly, reluctantly, everyone nodded.

-------------------------------------------------------------

**Gaah, I don't know that I like how it turned out very much...we'll see -crosses fingers-. I feel like I'm running out of adjectives and I suck at groups of people. So complicated... Yay for the hopes of a Grimmy Plushie. I'm hoping since the anime's gotten to him they'll release one soon. I'd also like a Shirosaki-kun plushie, because I'm weird and fangirlish like that. Other than those to my favorite character is Ichi-nii but I still don't have a plushie of him...what a shame... I recently got into this Jrock band, The Brilliant Green, I love their song "Angel Song". I've been listening to that while I write. **

**And celebrate, my fellow Bleach fans, Memories of Nobody has come to DVD! They'll be uploading it soon...personally I'm waiting to see if I can buy it on DVD rather then watch it on YouTube. So just holding out...**

**Thank you guys! I appreciate your support, and thank you for not being angry at me slowness.**

**-Orihs.**


	12. Chapter 12

**My deepest apologies to you. I understand that it has been over a month, if not more, since the last time I submitted a chapter. I posted a warning on my Deviant Art but I'm sure only one or two of you read it. I, myself, have not actually been on the internet for more than 5 minutes at time this whole, long month. You see, everything sort of happened unexpected... see it was just like one day (after a chain of events) it was like "We're moving to Washington in two weeks!". Of course then the next thing I knew I was out of school and spending my days packing boxes and saying good bye to people. But of course that had to happen after and partially during our problems with the internet. The one thing that I wanted to do before we pulled out of there was watch the new opening. We were leaving on the day the episode came out so I held off packing my computer as long as I could, waiting for the op to come out. BUT it wasn't on that episode and as of this moment, about a month later, I still haven't seen it. So anyway, yeah three days drive from Arizona to Washington. That was pretty insane... I'm sorry for making you wait such a long time, this is the second week in our new house (stayed with relatives at first till we got a house) and sadly when we rented it they didn't care to mention that the phone lines under the ground were broken so no internet! Until they fixed it... now I'm gonna try to get this show back on the road. Thank you for your patience, no matter how impatient it might have been, and for your reviews and seemingly everlasting support! **

**Warning: There is, indeed, a little bit of language in this one.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. (Question; Is this -- necessary for each chapter?)**

**---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

Karin leaned her back against the wall. Her broken arm rest relaxed on her lap. She was on _his_ bed. If he was there he would have kicked her off already, she had snuck in here unable to sleep. He was gone again... and all that she had for comfort was the word of that strange man. _"Well find him." _He had promised after she'd peeked out the window and seen that he wasn't there anymore. He left; that had scared her more than anything. He was gone! He could be still out there now, alone and struggling. Who's to say they even found him? No one ever confirmed he was safe and sound.

She felt tears trickling down her cheeks. _Please, _she thought, _please come home. Ichi-nii...please be alright... I don't know what we'd do if we lost you too..._

"Karin-chan?" Karin looked up; Yuzu was standing in the doorway.

"You weren't in bed... I thought you might be in here..." Yuzu explained. She walked in and climbed onto the bed next to Karin. "Karin-chan, are you okay?"

Karin wipped her eyes with the back of her arm. "Yeah," She said, steadying her voice. "I'm fine."

Yuzu stared at her sister skeptically. "Is it Ichi-nii?"

Karin's shoulders started shaking. "I want him to come home, I want him to be okay..." Yuzu hugged her twin, tears falling from her eyes as well.

"B-but the other night...Ichi-nii, he-he..."

"He wouldn't do something like that if he could help it! Do you really think Ichi-nii would actually attack us like that?! I-I don't really understand it... he was being controlled or something... but he couldn't help it! We can't be afraid of him... we can't... He came to us for help but he left because of what happened. Did you see him after what happened?! He knows what he did..." Karin said, practically sobbing. Yuzu rubbed her sisters back, trying to calm her down. After taking a minute to catch her breath and to get to a place where she could talk again; she continued. "What if they never found him? H-he could still be out there..."

Yuzu felt like crying as well, all hope seemed lost and it seemd that things would never get better... but now she had to be strong for her sister. So that for this moment Karin didn't have to.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Who do you want me to kill this time? That woman? Should I make her pay for being so kind to you? Or maybe that red headed guy that hurt you? But you'd like that, wouldn't you? Make him pay for yelling thoughs things at you. ...The man you thinks he can get rid of me? Or maybe I should go back and finish your sisters..._

"Stop it." Ichigo grumbled. His strength was faltering, he was being pushed under. He couldn't hold it any longer... _No...no..._ He was going to lose it. It was like climbing a cliff, he had lost his grip and slipt but was still desprately struggling to hold on. His hand slowly slipping from the rock that was his life line. A sickening agony filled his gut as his hand finally lost its grip and he no longer had a hold. Frigid, icey coldness surrounded him, engulfed him, as he plunged into the depths of his own soul.

"Ichigo" stood with ease, though there was a slight, complaining ache in his bones from being in the same position for so long. He stretched his arms out and yawned slightly. "You're physical pain is all most completely gone. That woman did good, huh, Ichigo? But quite tired..." The hollow said in a mocking manner as he cracked his knuckles. "But to think, even after all this they still leave you alone. How foolish..." He eyed the small, oil lamp that had been placed in the room not to long ago. In a swift movement he kicked it over, the glass shattered. Soon the now open flame would catch onto the tatami floor, and, if not stopped, it would eventually burn the whole place down. He grinned, turning his back on the flame he slid open the door. It was dark again, and quiet. On the contrary it was very unlikely that anyone was asleep. After the events of the past few days... and that was all because of him! The menace in his grin grew at the thought, _because of him!_ He looked up and down the hall, surprised there weren't even any guards.

"Ha! These people really are foolish!" The hollow cackeled. "I'll save you from this idiocracy, I'll kill them all!" He punched in the door across the hall from his; dissapointed to find it empty except a few small boxes in the corner. "Ichigo" felt the air for spiritual presences, locating all the people in the rooms ahead. The red headed shinigami was alone! How much fun would that be? Hopefully a worthy opponent... and the only person here who woul not hesitate to kill Ichigo.

The hollow made his way down the hall, his excitement growing with every step. This time he _would _kill, that was certain. No one would get in his way this time.

Almost as if on cue a door further down the hall slid open and out came the shinigami. Renji rubbed his forehead, to caught up in his stress that for a moment he didn't notice anything. Renji proceeded down the hall towards the hollow. _Rukia..._ He thought, _would you have wanted me to avenge you... or because of what it is would you have wanted me to forgive him? I don't know what to do anymore... I really just don't know... _He stopped, realizing the presence in the hall ahead of him. The sound of his own heart loudening in his ears, he looked up.

"-I-Ichigo?" He asked, his eyes frantically studying the figure infront of him. He could tell who it was, the reiatsu made that obvious. What he needed to know was, was he himself ... or was it the hollow? The figure stood in place, some 7 or 8 feet infront of him, in silence.

Before he knew it "Ichigo" had him by the throat, up against the wall; in much the same way Renji had had him earlier. His fingers dug into Renji's skin, an earnest attempt to strangle him. The hollow watched happily as the shinigami squirmed around, trying to break free of his grip. Renji could see the glint of the hollow's shiny, yellow eyes from underneath its mask. He managed to claw the hollows arm away. It took all his strength to hold the hollows arm back, its hand still only inches from his neck. He gulped greedily at the air, a little color returning to his blue tinted face.

"Damn it!" He growled furiously, determined not to let it have him again. But surprisingly the hollow drew his hand back and moved a little ways back. Renji hurriedly drew his sword.

"Howl, Zabimaru!" He called, waving his hand over the back of the blade. As his hand moved over it, it grew, extending to its released form. His Zanpaktou's shikai was terrifying in its shape; every segment had a long prong protruding from the top of it that further tore his enemys up, rather than simply 'slicing' them. His eyes were desperately trying to adjust to the darkness so he could see his target. Even though he could hardly see, Renji swung forward in a feverish attempt to protect himself.

It stopped.

Had it hit anything? Had it made contact?

It moved. He hadn't moved it. Renji quickly drew his Zabimaru back.

"Stupid Shinigami" He heard the hollow mutter. A small, glowing red ball formed, giving a little light to the darkened hallway. He could tell the light had formed infront of "Ichigo's" outstretched palm. It was almost too late by the time he realized what it was. _A cero?!_ Renji lunged to his right, his move wasn't very graceful. He fell on the ground, his zanpaktou was knocked out of his hand. A large, red beam shot out, entirely destroying the wall where he had been standing. With such a noisy attack someone would've heard it. It relieved him, but he also realized that this was like what must've happened to Rukia, except for that relief of knowing someone would help her. Her poor, torn body flashed in his head. His sweet, sweet Rukia had been attacked, tortured, and chased by this monster. It was _him_, he was finally face to face with her actual killer!

Renji crawled forward and grabbed his zanpaktou. He could fell a ting in his neck as he moved; it hurt, he could just imagine how badly bruised it would be when this was all over. The hollow moved slightly behind him, whither he stepped forwards, or backwards, or just turned, Renji was unsure but it startled him to his feet. They were once again face to face.

"So, your the hollow, huh?" Renji asked in a sarcastically conversational sort of manner, raising his sword. "Just who the hell do you think you are doing that to her?!" In a few seconds he had covered the few feet between them and had his Zabimaru up against "Ichigo's" throat.

He... it... (what ever you'd use to refer to a hollow) started laughing. "Who am I? Ha, ha, ha... Like a name? Well, I guess if you really want you can call me whatever you call _him_. Because really, no matter how you 'refine' him, his human body, spiritual body, soul. Their is no seperating us, because_ we_ are one. And still you guys think you can _fix_ him like he's some broken machine! You ignorant fouls!" The hollow slid his right hand between Zabimaru's blade and his throat. No blood appeared on his fingers as he grabbed it. The menacing grin that was permenantly plastered onto the holow's mask seemed to some how grow in its arrogant mockery and frightfulness.

Renji's mind refused to process what the hollow had been saying; too much time was being spent trying to understand them that he could hardly hold onto them. "Ichigo! I strongly suggest that'cha do something about this guy; he's really starting to piss me off and if he keeps goin' I might end up killing you."

"Sorry to burst your bubble, but I really don't think he can hear you." The hollow told him. _What? But Urahara had mentioned something about that, didn't he...? Yeah; he had said to watch what we were saying around Ichigo... and he also said that it worked the other way... so is the hollow lying? Or was Urahara wrong...?_

"You look confused; perhaps I better explain myself. You see, after he managed to 'postpone' me killing you, I thought it would be fun to mess with him a little. Not even four hours later and he seems to have already worked himself into unconsciousness." The hollow said, slowly pulling down on Renji's zanpaktou. Renji tried to pull his sword away from the hollow but even with all his might he could not even get it to budge from the hollow's grip. _That's impossible! How can he even do that?! That's just too godly... The only people I've seen able to do something like that were a few of the captains! _It was unnatural and uneasing to see the familiar orange hair, the whole overall figure of a friend so completely twisted and insane.

"I don't suppose you've seen my Zangetsu, have you?" The hollow asked, still sounding like there was some sort of humor in just about everything he said. Silence; Renji didn't say anything. He remembered clearly the large, butcher-knife like blade that had been leaning up against the wall in the main room. Of course he wouldn't say anything; this guy getting his hands on such a (dare he say it) magnificent zanpaktou would be absolutely horrifying. Why weren't Yoruichi or Urahara here yet? That cero blast should have been a clear warning. Yoruichi had left a little while ago... walking or something, it would be surprising if she had gone very far... Urahara was down in the basement with Tessai, Ururu, and Jinta. What an idiot that ex-captain was leaving this monster unattended!

"No?" The hollow asked after several minutes of silence had passed. "Welll then, I guess I'll just have to take yours." The hollow forced the sword down, faster and faster until, with his free hand he grabbed further up the blade, near to the handle. He simply pulled that part up, easily tearing the sword away from Renji. He flipped it around, grabbed the handle, and drove Zabimaru's long top into Renji's gut, nearly cutting him in half. Renji's blood clung to the sword as long as it could before dripping in large globs onto the floor. Renji gapped; starring wide eyed at the sword that had impaled him. _That was so fast, I-I couldn't dodge..._

"...monster..." He muttered, the coppery tast filled his mouth. Things seemed to blur and shake all around him. His footing was becoming wobbly... _No! I can't be down yet! Not yet. I've taken worse than this... I can do it..._

The hollow pulled the zanpaktou back, twirled it so the blad was vertical, and drove it forward. This Renji dodged... for the most part - still his shoulder down to part of his arm got caught. His dodging skills were low at the moment. It was more like slamming his whole being into the wall. Fortunately or unfortunately, the 'wall' happened to be yet another door. The light wood and paper easily crumbled under his weight; he crashed into one of Urahara's many empty rooms.

The splintered bits of wood under him weren't really the best thing to catch his fall, it probably wouldn't have been as painful to have fallen on the floor. But now wasn't the right time to complain, trying not to think about the sting he felt from his wound, he pushed himself up on his elbows. _I need to calm down, even if he killed Rukia, even if its Ichigo, none of that matters! I have to focus or he'll kill me. I'm not even supposed to be fighting him! Urahara said the hollow might even be out of his leauge. How am I going to even have a chance?! I need a plan...or something..._

"Is that really all you've got?" The hollow asked, disappointed. "I was hoping you'd be able to put up more of a fight than Ichigo, but I guess not. I'm getting tired of chasing around helpless, little rats. If you're that weak, I'll just kill you now!"

Renji pushed himself up and tumbled into the room. _A weapon... _The air in this room was considerably colder than it was in the hall. Parallel to the hole created by the hollow's cero was yet another hole, also caused from the blast. It looked as if the part of the wall had burned away. He could see the asphalt outside, slightly lit by the stars in the night sky, He didn't like running away but it was a valueable escape route.

_Shot._ He thought, turning around to make sure the hollow would follow him. Even if he had to get away he still needed the hollow to chase him for the same reason he had stood and fought with it when he was supposed to just run away. If it didn't follow him there was a good chance it would find the two girls who were just a little further down the hall. He knew he had more of a chance than two human girls ever would. Sure enough the hollow was watching him through the now broken doorway. Renji clenched his teeth and ran out into the cold night.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Chapter End! It was a kb or two under where I was hoping it would be, but it's not too short. I know things might not look like they're wrapping up just yet, but they are. Getting back on the ball! The next chapter is almost completely written (along with a few other parts from later chapters), and by written I do mean traditionally written with pencil and paper. It was suggested to me by... (Gaah! with the names and what-not, I'd check but I don't have internet just yet) one of you who was talking with me on Deviant Art. They suggested it might be a good idea to do a rough draft, so that's what I'm doing! If that works how it's supposed to it should for the most part deminish my grammar-spelling errors. But, sadly, yes it does take longer to finish, I spent the last hour typing up the last 8 paragraphs. Well, I'm so happy to be back with you. Oh, guess what? Shirochan's b-day's coming up, it's on the 24th of November, that's two days after Thanksgiving. Right now it's the 10th so exactly 2 weeks. So...yeah...that's pretty cool... um... so I guess I'll catch you guys later then...**

**-Shiro**


	13. Chapter 13

**Okay, okay... Chapter 13. Not much to say but I'm going to check this on Microsoft Word. So that, rough draft, and double editing should make it nice and clean. Please tell me if you catch anything though, and thank you for being understanding and not flaming me about my errors. Thank you for the reviews!!! Oh, and I wanted to say that I wont leave you guys, I'm going to finish this for sure!**

**Disclaimer: Yeah...yeah...I don't own Bleach.**

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

The hollow watched Renji; but instead of following him the hollow turned and walked down the hall. The shinigami would be easy enough to catch up to. _Ah,_ he thought, walking into the main dining room type area. _There it is! _He grabbed the hilt of his Zangetsu. Such a wonderful sword shouldn't be wasted as a corner decoration. The hollow dropped Renji's Zabimaru uselessly to the ground. He turned it over in his hands. "I warned you, Old Man." He said to it. Now, it was time to find that shinigami...

---------------------------- (**Okay, I'm not sure how people usually do this. I'm going back in time a few minutes to take it from a different stand point.)**

Orihime sat in the middle of the floor, Tatsuki constantly pacing back and forth in front of her. She watched Tatsuki's feet in a blanked-out worry.

"Shot...shot...shot..." Tatsuki grumbled. She took a deep breath, finally ceasing in her obsessive pacing. "It's fine...It's fine, he's going to be alright. He's going to get better and he'll be okay again."

"No...he wont-" Orihime started but Tatsuki quickly cut her off.

"Orihime! Don't say that!" Tatsuki shouted, feeling overwhelmingly stressed. "Don't you want him to be okay?!"

"It's not that I don't want him to be okay... It's just that it feels like everyone is expecting things to be normal again when the hollow is taken care of. But Kurosaki-kun wont... he's not going to magically feel better again. Rukia... I know you don't remember her... she got killed by the hollow at the start of all this... Kurosaki-kun was... in love with her." She felt a few tears leaking from her eyes, she tried hard to restrain anymore that might want to come. "He loved her very much... for as long as I've known him I never once saw him as happy as he was when he was with her. Urahara told you about Soul Society and the execution, he told you about why the hollow is there now, did you realize that he did that _for her_? There wasn't anything in the world he wanted more than to save her. He would've done anything! B-but in the end it was him who killed her. So what if Urahara's plan works? Sure the hollow will be gone, but what will be left of Kurosaki-kun? That thing's tormenting him! I wouldn't be surprised if the first thing he did was jump off a bridge!"

"He-" Tatsuki started, but both girls stopped, hearing something coming from outside the room... voices. But who was it? They could hardly make out who it was and what they were saying... a crash... a thud. The girls looked at each other. Was it what it sounded like? Orihime ran to the door.

"Stay here!" She whispered to Tatsuki. Orihime waited a short moment, that to her felt as if it had lasted forever, before she slid the door open. _Ba-bum, ba-bum_, her heart beat loudly... but there was no one in the hall.

-----------------------------------

Renji ran full force away from the old shop. He only got so far, nearly to the street, before he realized that the hollow wasn't there. Letting out a small stream of curse words, he turned back around. It surprised him to see a figure running towards him.

"Renji!" Orihime shouted, running up to him. "Thank goodness you're alright!"

"What are you doing here?!" Renji asked, breathing heavily. He doubled over, holding onto her shoulder for support.

"Renji, are you okay?! You're bleeding!"

But he regained himself quickly. "It's nothing, I'm fine. Where's your friend?"

"She's still inside, I-"

Renji didn't let her finish. "I'm going back in for her. The hollow's taken over him, if you see him I want you to run and hide, do _not_ try to fight him. Wait here." Before she could reject he had already disappeared into the small alley way that was between the shop and the brick wall.

---------------------------------- **(We're taking it back again, about 30 min more than last time)**

Urahara sat at the low table, he was so busy with his thoughts that he didn't hear the figure behind him. Yoruichi kneeled behind him, she slid her arms around him (which really gave him a startle), and rested her head on his should. He reached up and grabbed her arm.

"I'm sure it will work." Yoruichi reassured him, but he shook his head.

"I could convince the kids, but I still can't quite convince myself. It's too risky... He's Isshin's son, what will I tell him if it doesn't work?" Urahara sighed.

"Wouldn't you rather tell him that his son died well you were trying to save him, rather than not trying at all?"

"Yeah, you're right... I better finish putting it together." Yoruichi let go of him and he stood up. "Thank you."

"Good luck! I'm going to take a walk and get a breath of fresh air. I won't go too far but if you're going to be in the basement just make sure you don't leave him alone, okay?

"Sure thing, Tessai's back there right now."

----------------------------------- **(It's still back in time)**

Renji was laying on his back, starring up at the ceiling when there was a light knocking on his door. Unsure if he had really heard a knock, he sat up slowly, watching the door. Already tired of waiting for a response, Urahara opened it. "Abarai-san, sorry for bothering you, I need Tessai's help in the basement. You don't have to sit there but would you mind checking on Kurosaki-san every once in a while? Nothing's happened in hours so I strongly doubt it will now, but we should try to stay on the safe side."

"Yeah...sure."

Urahara smiled and bowed his head slightly. "Thank you."

--------------------------------** (Back to regular time)**

The cold breeze swirled and danced around her before hurrying away to find another victim to help freeze. Yoruichi smiled, there really wasn't anything more calming than fresh air. It was easier to think... much easier. She would stroll around a little more, she'd go back to the shop, they'd give Ichigo the pill, he'd be good and healthy again... things would go back to how they had been and everything, _everything_, would be how it should be. The cold breeze made her feel like all of that was set in stone, destined to be. She was enjoying herself so much that at first she didn't feel the new reiatsu that had appeared. But the extent and power in it slowly washed over her, she stopped in her tracks, starring up at the sky.

"No..." She muttered. _A shinigami captain!? Why now of all times!!! I need to see if I can divert him... _Yoruichi took off running.

-------------------------------

Renji only paused for a second before entering through the large hole. He stopped suddenly, only a step or two into the building, upon realizing exactly who was standing but a few feet away. Instantly he scrambled back into the alleyway, his back hit the wall behind him and he stood there, starring at the blackness. Slowly the hollow's features were visible until he was just inside the hole. The hollow watched him, amused. With one hand he held Ichigo's enormous Zanpaktou over his shoulder. There was already blood covering the tip which pitter-pattered onto the ground behind him. In his other he had what looked like an arm. Noticing Renji eyeing it, the hollow smirked, raising it up so he could see it better. It _was_ an arm, a black arm with a large red strip running up it. "Sorry if I'm late, ran into your friend in the hall." The hollow laughed, throwing Sado's arm at Renji's feet. He lifted the Zanpaktou off his shoulder and pointed it straight out at Renji. "Now, it's your turn."

His very core shaking, Renji took off, back out of the alley. He was almost there when the hollow ran up behind him, using the large, flat expanse of its Zangetsu to throw him against the wall in front of the shop. Now in sight of Orihime, she gasped, quickly covering her mouth to stifle the noise.

Renji tried to recover, getting to his feet, his balance was still wobbly. Before he knew it the hollow had him against the brick wall again, with the humongous Zanpaktou to his throat. Renji grabbed the blade and tried to push it away. The hollow leaned in closer. "Sorry shinigami, I'm done playing games." He whispered, with his other hand placed on the back of the large sword, he pushed. Like a white hot knife through butter, the great Zanpaktou slid through Renji's skin, and into the wall behind him. It completely disconnected his head from his body and his fingers from his hands. The hollow backed away, yanking his Zangetsu out of the brick wall. Renji's body fell forward onto the ground; his head tumbled a few feet away. Blood poured out onto the asphalt from his opened neck.

Excitement running through his veins, the hollow turned to the girl. But then something happened, he stopped, reached up and grabbed his masked face as if he'd suddenly gotten a cold headache. He stayed like that for a moment before his hand dropped back to his side. Orihime saw the look in his eyes wasn't the same excitement and lunacy she'd seen just a moment before. The hollow actually looked _upset_, but that too seemed to quickly fade.

Their eyes met... _ba-bum, ba-bum..._ she wanted to run but her legs wouldn't budge. She knew she was next... any second now he'd be in front of her, ready to kill her... but he didn't move! Finally he spoke. "Ya know, the kid was always trying so hard to protect you, it seems like such a shame to kill you so easily... but I guess it can't be helped." The hollow brought his sword up into the air, but before he could attack a large, fluorescent, flash hit him. The hollow was knocked onto his back, his Zanpaktou clinking onto the ground.

Urahara walked out of the shop, towards the hollow. The hollow was easily back on his feet by the time Urahara reached him. Instead of fighting, Urahara used some sort of bakidou. Two large, crafted, metal clamps appeared, restraining the hollow both at his upper arms and chest, and around his knees. The clamps were sculpted like giant hands, clenching there victim in their large fists. Urahara picked him up by the back of the upper clamp, he struggled at first but after a short time he gave up, finding it futile. Tessai, Ururu, and Jinta ran out of the shop after him.

"Take care of this! Find everyone and get them back inside, I'm going to take care of him." Urahara shouted at them, heading back to the shop.

-------------------------------------------

Yoruichi stared at the figure in front of her. "Hitsugaya-taichou?" She questioned. He glared at her, sort of annoyed.

"Yes?"

Yoruichi smirked at the captain. Surely Soul Society wouldn't have sent their youngest for an execution. Unless they were testing him or something... The two were on the roof of one of Kakura Town's taller buildings. Yoruichi sat on the ledge, watching the lights flickering and moving below. Hitsugaya leaned up against the door to the stairs, watching the woman grimly and unamused.

"Where are the others?" She asked, turning back to him. The captain walked over to the ledge to look down at the lights.

"Soul Society didn't send me back, I came here to find Renji. As I'm assuming you know, Kuchiki Rukia was killed. Soul Society refused to take action so I came to make sure Renji wasn't getting himself killed." Hitsugaya sighed. "There's something weird about this whole thing.

Yoruichi felt a little uneasy. "What do you mean?" She asked slowly. She wondered if she should tell him, or if it would be too risky, would the captain side with them or with the Soul Society? What if the pill worked but the Soul Society decided to execute him anyway?

"Well, the Technology Bureau said they'd only had one Arrancar appearance, which was killed easily. Captain-Commander Yamamoto thinks that Renji knows something so they're waiting for him to return. But if he was in Soul Society how would he know anything? This reiatsu...can you feel it?"

Yoruichi nodded. "Yeah, it does feel like it could be an Arrancar. But... somehow it's a lot creepier." Suddenly something in the air seemed to change, it felt empty and strange... the two looked at each other. "That's Renji. C'mon, let's go!" Yoruichi shouted, disappearing almost instantly. _Kisuke... did you forget to watch the boy? This is bad._

----------------------------------------------

Urahara dragged the hollow across the dusty ground until he finally reached the spot he wanted to go to. Two chains protruded from the ground, they twisted a short ways before ending in a cuff. The ex-captain picked each up and, one at a time, fastened them onto each of the hollow's wrists before he took off the large, metal, molded clamps. As one last measure of precaution he reached up and tore off its mask. The white mask instantly crumbled in his hands, he was a little surprised at first that the hollow was still in control. But just as well, he'd need it again soon anyway. The unmasked hollow grinned, his yellow eyes glowing with a mixture of excitement and despise. Nonetheless Urahara could tell it was starting to feel weak, its breathing was heavier than before and a lot of that crazy energy seemed to missing.

"Those shackles, as you can probably tell, are each attached to a five foot cube of Sekiseki that's been buried under the ground. Even for you, breaking out of that is just about impossible." Urahara explained. It confused him, to think that the hollow could still smile like that. On the brink of its downfall and it was still grinning.

"Aren't ya gonna do it? Eh, Old Man, don't give me that look. The pill, weren'tcha gonna try it?" 'Ichigo' asked. Urahara reached inside his robes and pulled it out; small, black, and menacing in its own way. But why the heck was the hollow encouraging him? It didn't make sense... would it work... or would it fail?

"Still unsure? Maybe I can enlighten you. Of course something like that wouldn't work, it would kill him. But maybe if you think I'm lying we could give it a try. Aah..." The hollow opened his mouth, his hands could barely move from where they were at his sides, the short chain was taught. Urahara didn't move a muscle. The hollow shut his mouth, grinning even wider. "Did I ruin your plans? Throw away your only chance of hope? There's nothing left to do... so what are you going to do now? The only other person who knew it wouldn't work was just decapitated in front of your shop. You don't have to tell anyone you knew, do it anyway. There's really not another option, no matter what he's gonna be dead in the end, so why not end up the hero? You can tell your friend that it was suppose to save his son, but sometimes things don't work how they should. You don't wanna have to tell him that you let the Soul Society kill him, do you? C'mon, it will be _our_ secret."

Urahara grabbed his hat, thinking hard. Really, what was he supposed to do? He still felt strongly objective to killing Ichigo... but what else could be done? He couldn't keep the boy locked up forever... what kind of life would that be for him? Were they being cruel keeping him alive even until now? It was the same general idea of putting an animal to sleep so they wouldn't suffer a slow, painful death... was it wrong not to? And what if the Soul Society did come to kill the boy? Isshin would be upset because he, himself, would've fought to the death to protect his son. Urahara stared out at the crafted, desert landscape with its always bright, blue sky that made him forget it was the middle of the night, hoping something would happen so that right now he didn't have to choose.

-----------------------------------------

Ichigo slowly opened his eyes. _He's trying to mess with you, Urahara. _He thought, solemnly watching the cracking street. The sky was grey and dreary, although hardly any rain fell. Large chunks of stone and metal broke off the buildings and tumbled away to the ground. What was left of the buildings were skeleton-ish in shape and several had already completely crumbled away. It was the end... this had to be it... this world was falling apart.

"I'm dying..." Mumbled Ichigo, watching his arms. Like the buildings pieces of him were breaking away... eventually _everything_ here would crumble.

------------------------------------------

**Yay! Another one Hey! I apologize a head of time, the next two chapters are going to be on the shorter side of things. I know I was aiming to get the chapters longer but what's done is done and I'm not changing it. Well...they aren't done, only in meh noggin -knocks on head-. So, have a good Thanksgiving! Sorry about killing Renji...heh... it's rather sad really...**

**-SHIRO**


	14. Chapter 14

**Gomennasai! I know, all I seem to be able to do is apologize... and turn chapters in late. I wrote chapter 14 but I really hated it and at the last minute scrapped it and decided to start again. I took the pieces I like from the original and glued the thing back to better with a better type of glue. Guuh, I hate turning it in so late. Sorry! Again, I apologize.**

**Thanks for the reviews!!!! I Don't Own Bleach!!! (In case you were wondering.)**

**-----------------------------------------------------------------------------**

Urahara watched the approaching figures in the distance, relieved for only a moment before he recognized the two figures with Yoruichi; Orihime and the captain of the 10th Division. _A captain?_ He frowned, that couldn't be good. When they reached him Yoruichi set Orihime down, she was wrapped in a fuzzy, purple-grayish blanket, shivering and crying. She slowly walked over to the hollow; she found that it was twice as scary without its mask. Because without it, it _was_ him. The only way one could tell was by the eyes... those horrible, terrible, malicent eyes.

Hitsugaya nodded at the former captain, who simply returned the gesture. Yoruichi watched the hat-ed man angrily but he didn't seem to notice that she was upset.

"Kisuke! What happened! Renji and Sado are _dead_ and half of the shop has burned down!" She growled in a half-whisper, Urahara searched for an answer, the knot of guilt in his stomach growing, but he couldn't think. Neither of the two looked very happy.

"I left him with Renji, only for a minute so Tessai could help me bury the Sekiseki..." He tried to explain, not too proud of his answer. Yoruichi let out a small sigh, deciding she could kill him for it later (a little sarcasm used of course...). She walked ahead of the two and stood next to Orihime.

"This, Hitsugaya-taichou, is the cause of this whole mess." She said, the young captain immediately walked over to her. _The shinigami representative?! _He thought, shocked as he realized who the chained figure was. There was no doubt that he was the source of that eerie reiatsu; this air was so full of it, it felt as if he had bugs crawling under his skin. He studied the chains with which the representative was bound. _This doesn't make sense!_ _Why _him_? He was the reason I let her stay! Why would he kill her?! _Rather than it all making sense, things just got more confusing all of a sudden.

"Kurosaki... that doesn't make sense. Something's not right, what's wrong with him?" He asked, watching the hollow who seemed pleased to have even this small audience at his disposal.

"...I'm sure you remember the whole invasion to stop Rukia's execution? Did you know that before he had completely lost his shinigami powers? He needed them to save her and this was the only way he could get them back." Yoruichi told him. The white-haired captain thought hard, trying to connect the dots... _this reiatsu... _his eyes flew open as it struck him.

"Y-you don't mean... he turned himself into a hollow?!" Yoruichi only nodded in response. "That's insane! Who would even think to try something like that?! That's practically suicide! I-I mean... someone with his power... a _hollow_ with his power! H-how did he do that?!!" Hitsugaya gasped, trying to grasp the idea. To turn one's self into a hollow... that couldn't be pleasant... _it seems like he was so desperate to save her... would I have been able to do something like this for Hinamori...?_

"He managed to get his soul out of his body, and he... broke his chain of fate. After that I'm not too sure, he some how speeded up the process and then altered it right before it was complete so that he wasn't exactly a 'hollow'. I don't really understand how it works..." Yoruichi answered slowly. Urahara couldn't help but smile; she was making it sound like he had done this to himself, cleverly avoiding a problem between them and the Soul Society.

Hitsugaya was still trying to process, wondering how in the world a representative of all people would think of trying that. "...Did it work?"

"Well," Yoruichi started, gesturing towards the hollow who seemed busy messing with the cuff that was still tightly clamped around his right wrist, most likely contemplating his best option for getting it off. Although there really wasn't much of a point, the boy was dying, he was dying. _They_ don't know it, if he hadn't been hooked up to this darn Sekiseki his steadily decreasing reiatsu would've been obvious, and they wouldn't be wasting their time now; still trying to decide how _not_ to kill him. He viewed the world around him as being ignorant; they thought simple, talked simple, and behaved in simple ways. They would never be able to understand the uniqueness of his existence; they would never know nor understand the boy as well as he did. Yoruichi cleared he throat, deciding how to word it. "It did... for a while... I guess he was still in the Soul Society when the problems began. He saved her but things went downhill after that... and then a few days ago he lost control and it killed her."

"Why! ...why? Why did you kill her?!" Orihime yelled unexpectedly at the chained up hollow. The other three turned to her, surprised. He smiled, leaning forward as far as the chains would allow.

"Because it was so fricken' ironic! Ichigo always acts so tough but he's only human, and such a fragile one at that... at first I was only messing with him, ya know. The king wasn't supposed to fall, yet. But you should've seen him when I was killing that girl. 'Stop it! Don't hurt her! No! Stop! She's gonna die! STOP IT!!!' Eventually he realized he couldn't stop me, he was screaming and begging as I forced him to watch me cut that little girl up. It was pathetic, but seeing him like that was so fun, almost addict-" There was a sickening silence as Orihime's fist made contact with the hollow's icy skin, hitting him right between his shadowy eyes.

"...You sick monster." She growled, in a tone they'd never heard from her before. The hollow glared at her through Ichigo's body, although he seemed perfectly unharmed. Urahara was the only one who noticed the hollow wrapping the chains around his arms and pulling, testing their strength. The Sekiseki should be enough to diminish his strength but it still wasn't safe to put all of their eggs into one basket. Yoruichi quickly pulled Orihime back to a safer distance. A wide grin spread across 'Ichigo's' face, he snickered, extremely pleased with himself.

"You don't like that? But I wasn't done, that's only the tip of the iceberg!" He laughed. Orihime was shaking with anger, she pulled against Yoruichi's hold. Hitsugaya quickly stepped between the two, placing his hand on the hilt of his Zanpaktou as a warning.

"What are you going to do with him then?" Hitsugaya asked, a strong sternness evident in his voice. Urahara drew his fan out from whatever magical place he was always storing it, and flicked it open in front of his face. Doing such was a habit to him and he did it without thinking.

"I don't know... we've exhausted all possible options and are at the end of our line here..."

"The pill!" Yoruichi reminded him, but he shook his head.

"It won't work." Urahara told her. She looked at him, annoyed. She was starting to have enough of his uncertainty, it really wasn't the time. If they had a chance they should take it. A sudden loud creaking caught everyone's attention. They exchanged fearful looks, from the hollows persistent chain pulling a few of the metal links were starting to break. In one fluid motion Hitsugaya drew his Zanpaktou and held the blade against the hollows neck. The hollow flinched slightly as the cold metal touched its skin. He watched the captain with a smug look on his face, tiny beads of sweat running along his skin.

"We need to do something _now_, Urahara, that's not going to hold him!" The white headed captain shouted.

----------------------------------------------

A heavy, dark green blanket wrapped around her body, Tatsuki stood against the wall where it opened to the street. The cold didn't intrude her warm cover but still shivers ran through her body. She watched Urahara's three strange subordinates removing the burnt wood from the small section of the shop that had burned down. They carried charred pieces and set them in a growing pile in the shops front yard. Luckily the fire had only damaged the room Ichigo had been staying in and part of the one next to it. It was pretty obvious what the cause was...

Tatsuki casted a quick glance at the two laid out figures, their bodies covered up with blankets, laying on the ground beside her. Silently, tears streamed down her face. She had wanted to be alone, she couldn't go with the others, she couldn't see _him_. _This is the end, isn't it? There isn't time for contemplating now... either they find something that would work... or they didn't. _The later meaning he would be dead. It was such a horrible way too. Even though Ichigo tended to be arrogant... hot headed... and very foolish. Bur he was still very kind and hurting his friends was the last thing he'd want to do.

"...Ichigo..." She heard a whiny voice from behind her. Tatsuki peeked around the corner of the brick wall. A slumped over, very tired looking Keigo was walking down the street right outside Urahara's shop. Seeing Tatsuki he seemed to pop more awake.

"Tatsuki!" He exclaimed, a little louder than he meant to. She walked around so she was standing in front of him. It took him a moment to make out her features with only the dim light of a nearby street lamp. "Are you okay?! Tatsuki, what's a matter?"

Tatsuki wiped the tears away with the back of her hand. "It's just... it's nothing. What are you doing, isn't it late?"

Keigo stared at her for a minute, almost in a 'space cadet' sort of way. "Oh, me?" He asked, snapping out of it. "Yeah... I was looking for Ichigo and I... got lost...But! If this is your house I think I know my way home from here!"

"This isn't, we both live quite a ways from here."

Keigo looked up at the dark sky, tears streamed from his eyes in almost a comical manner. "Why? Why do these things always happen to me?" He complained. "But hey, you weren't at school today... or yesterday... do you know where he is?"

Tatsuki's eyes instantly averted his. What was she supposed to tell him? She couldn't tell him the truth! It was too much... too much to explain without breaking down... too much to make him hear. She couldn't stand being the one to feed him that information...

"What is it? What happened?" He asked after seeing her reaction. He didn't seem tired anymore, all his attention was pulled into this conversation.

"Ichigo is... Ichigo is... very sick..."

"Is he going to be okay?"

"...I don't know." Reluctantly, Keigo moved towards her and placed his hand on her shoulder, their eyes met... he felt like his heart was throbbing in his throat, learning something really was wrong. He didn't want to ask her anything else, just yet, seeing how it was taking a toll on her... maybe wait for her to calm down so he could find out where Ichigo was. But for now he just needed to be a good friend. "C'mon, I'll walk you home."

Tatsuki hesitated, was it okay to leave? But she went with him, back the way he had come.

Walking side by side Keigo glanced back to where he had run into Tatsuki, wondering exactly where _that_ was... he wasn't sure if it was a good idea to ask. "Hey Tatsuki..." He asked slowly, but that feeling her eyes held when she looked at him cracked at his heart. He couldn't... it wasn't a big deal was it? Why couldn't he? Giving up, he just smiled sheepishly and said: "I'm really sure where to go, I hope you don't mind helping me find it."

----------------------------------

"I need an answer!" Hitsugaya shouted, impatiently as another groan came from the chains. Urahara took a deep breath, his eyes meeting Yoruichi's, and for the first time... a look of resignation was on his face.

"...maybe we should...just..."

"No! We can't give up on him! That's Kurosaki-kun you're talking about! I won't let you kill him! I won't! I won't! Orihime shouter, once again struggling against Yoruichi. She didn't realize how hypocritical she was being. "Please! They're all... they're gone..." _...I'm alone... _"Please, not him too... I can't loose him too" _...I'm selfish... _"Please!!" _...he wants to die... _"please..."

"It's not _him_ anymore. Ichigo is gone." Urahara started.

"You don't know that for sure!" She protested.

"He's not fighting it anymore, or the hollow wouldn't still be in control." He tried explaining his reason.

Hitsugaya let his eyes drift away from the chained hollow to the three people behind him. "Hey," He said, the tone of his voice having changed to calmer, more understanding. "Do you remember what we learned in the Soul Academy?"

"Yeah...?"

"A normal soul turns into a hollow, but when a hollow is destroyed with a Zanpaktou the soul is 'cleansed' and not 'killed'. The original soul then is able to pass on to the Soul Society. So if Kurosaki was in a 'soul form' when he turned into a hollow then-"

"His soul should still pass on." Yoruichi gasped, finishing his sentence for him. The logic was so simple... it seemed so obvious... why hadn't they thought of it?!

"Theoretically... yes... but I'm not 100 sure it will work that way in his case," Hitsugaya said, turning his attention back to the hollow.

Urahara narrowed his eyes. "Orihime, listen. That means we have a chance to save him, but we need to act now and it will mean killing him. We don't know if what Hitsugaya suggested will work but we should try it."

Orihime looked ready to argue but her eyes fell to the floor and she nodded slowly. "Okay..." Her voice trembled.

Hitsugaya readied his stance, his body tensed. "I'll do it then." He breathed, the sword shook slightly as Hitsugaya wandered if he really had it in him to end the shinigami's life. _One blow... kill him instantly and don't let him suffer. _He stared into the solemn, yellow eyes of the hollow, who understood that it stood face to face with the en of its existence. The captain steadied his sword, swooping it back into the air at an angle. He breathed deeply.

Yoruichi watched Hitsugaya, following each small movement, small adjustment with intense attention. It suddenly dawned on her that they were letting Orihime watch as her friend was killed. How horrible traumatic could that be? The cherry on top of the sundae. Yoruichi quickly turned Orihime around and hugged her to her chest.

The sound of Hitsugaya's sword, whistling through the air towards its target was all that could be heard.

Orihime pushed away from Yoruichi. "Come back to me, Kurosaki-kun!!!" She shouted.

There was a soft thud as his body hit the floor, out of view from behind the captain. All she could see was the blood creeping along the dirt, extending outward as more spilt from the shinigami's body.

----------------------------------------------------------

**I really hope that chapter was okay. The story's not over **_**yet**_**. I will try to not take so long with this next chapter. I won't work on anything else until it is done!**

**Missed You; Happy Holidays!**

**-Shiro**


	15. Chapter 15

**Hey Everyone. Thanks so much for reading! Thanks for all the reviews! A special thanks to DecemberPie (dA name) for helping me with this chapter!!! Thank you very much, twas kind of you! **

**Chrosis: Yeah, in my mind it was more of **_**almost being cut in half**_**. Maybe I should've had a little more description with that, I just wanted the scene to be almost from more of Orihime's point of view. I figured since they say 'Reiatsu is a Shinigami's life force' if the Sekiseki had been devouring his reiatsu he'd probably be easier to kill... Thank you! I'm so happy I figured it out, I had an epiphany. I was 'OMG! That works!!!'. Thank you so much for taking the time to review!**

**Dr Silo: Ah... Hnn... I don't know how that would actually work. I think I see what you mean though, because to destroy a hollow you usually have to break the mask... I'm sorry. I guess I don't really know how to answer you. My apologies, thanks so much for taking the time to review.**

**I apologize; those are thus far the only two I know how to respond to besides grinning, nodding, and thanking you profusely. I wish I could name everyone... but I probably can't so: THANK YOU SOOO, SOOO, VERY MUCH!!!!**

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------- **

The ceiling fan buzzed with a low hum, its blades spinning slowly around, and around. The local news channel droned on in the background. Karin stared at the door, kicking her feet idly. Several papers were spread across the table in front of her; the days homework, hardly touched. She just couldn't focus. It had been a week and still they hadn't heard anything. She watched the door, silently willing it to open to reveal her missing brother. That tactic had thus far proved... useless... and from the lack of focus her grades had begun to suffer. Suddenly there was a knocking on the door. Startled, Karin jumped out of her seat. She stared at the door, her heart racing, wondering if she had really heard knocking... or if it had been her imagination. A cause of wishful thinking. The knocking sounded a second time and Karin bolted to it. She didn't hesitate even a second before flinging open the front door.

Her heart sunk, the strange blonde haired man with the white and green striped hat stood before her. She couldn't help but look out past him, hoping to see her brother.

"How is he?" She asked instantly, not bothering with a greeting.

"Is your father home?" The man asked, ignoring her question. Karin felt her throat tighten.

"Yeah... he's in the front... I'll go get him. Uh... please feel free to come in." With that Karin made her way to the door into the clinic, in a dazed worry. She poked her head in; her father was busy writing at his desk. He didn't make any signs of having noticed her presence.

"Dad... the man who took Ichi is here." She said. He stood up instantly, dropping his pen onto the desk. Without meeting her eyes he walked in past her.

'The Hat Wearing Man' was standing meekly in front of the closed door. "Sorry it took so long to come. I want to talk... though I'm sure you have noticed."

"I would prefer to talk outside." Isshin said a bit gruffly as he opened the door. The two filed out in a stiff, nervous manner. Karin just stared, the feeling of agony growing in the pit of her stomach. That man's tone... his expression... wrecked of bad news. _No. Ichi-nii... Ichi-nii... _She couldn't move; frozen in a fearful realization. _He's dead, isn't he? Ichigo is gone... just like Mom. He's not coming back._ She was surprised when no tears came, even when there was no doubt in her mind that he was gone. Instead of sadness, anger whelmed up inside her. Anger at him for leaving, even though their family was already so broken. Anger at the man who was supposed to be taking care of him. Anger at herself for not doing, or not being able to do anything to stop him. She stumbled backwards and bumped into the table. Instantly she turned around and scooped all of her books and papers off the table, cussing loudly. Yuzu stirred from where she had been sleeping on the couch, Karin waited tensely to see if she'd woken up her sister... but Yuzu seemed to still be sleeping. Karin walked into the living room and collapsed into the fluffy chair. _It's my fault, he needed my help... I let him down, I was afraid of him. I was afraid of Ichi-nii... I left him in the hands of that man because I was afraid. And now Ichi won't come back, will he? Please... please, God, let me be wrong. Don't give me bad news._

The front door opened, Mr. Green and White Hat Man had his hat in his hand, clutched to his chest. He bowed lowly to her father who was walking back in. "I'm so sorry, Kurosaki-san."

Isshin seemed to sort of nod, before shutting the door. He looked at his daughter, his eyes were red and gloom filled. What was he supposed to say to his daughter? Was it wrong to give her hope? Was it wrong to crush it? According to Urahara _'he could still come back'_.

Karin climbed out of her chair and ran to her father. She flung her arms around him (ignoring the pain that shot up her casted arm) and buried her head in his chest.

--------------------------------------

The proud Quincy boy walked down the streets, a book bag slung over his shoulder. He couldn't help smile a little, he finally had them back! He could feel his power coursing through his body. Now he'd be ready for whatever mess Ichigo got them into next, he'd be ready for the war. _Nothing to do with the Shinigami... _his smile fell from his face. How was he supposed to get around that? _Oh well... I'm sure I'll figure something out_. Coming upon a realization Ishida halted, looking up at the sky. _I don't feel that idiot's reiatsu. Did he go somewhere? _So he had missed out on 'Kurosaki's Next Big Adventure', hadn't he? He concentrated, pinpointing his other nakama. The shinigami were gone... Ichigo was gone... Sado was gone... but Orihime was still here. That was kind of weird, Orihime really wasn't one to be happy being left behind, no matter how dangerous. Figuring it was nothing Ishida kept walking towards the large, school building.

The school day went by long... slow... and otherwise boring and uneventful, even though he could feel her, Orihime wasn't there. The new kid was gone too... _What his name? Hi-Hirio...Hiramu...Hiraku...something like that... _Ishida glanced back at Tatsuki, seeing that she looked, well, upset. He simply figured it was none of his business and went about his day minding his own business, but, by the time school got out, the whereabouts of his companions had been nagging at the back of his mind so he approached Tatsuki.

"Do you know where Orihime is?" He asked in a flat tone. Tatsuki looked up at him thoughtfully... and after a second she stood up.

"Yeah, I do. You're one of her friends right? You were always disappearing with them..." She asked slowly. Ishida felt a little confused but nodded in agreement. "Okay, she's in her apartment, you can come with me, if you want, I'm going there in a minute."

Ishida wasn't necessarily used to interacting with Tatsuki, he knew she was Ichigo's and Orihime's friend but hadn't really talked to her a whole let himself. The two walked through town in complete silence until they finally stopped in front of the two-story apartment building. Tatsuki looked up at him with almost a grave expression. "Just watch what you say, she's still really broken up over the whole thing."

Ishida blinked, dumbfounded. "What do you mean?"

But Tatsuki was already racing up the stairs. Sighing, he followed her up.

Orihime invited them in with a half smile, her whole apartment was over all... dark, as she hadn't opened any of the curtains. She invited the two of them to sit down while she poured them some tea. Ishida sat, a little grudgingly, on the floor. Tatsuki plopped down next to him, folding her arms on the table top and resting her head on them like a pillow.

Orihime walked in with a tray holding three, sage green teacups. After setting down their cups she took a seat between them.

"It's been a while..." She said to Ishida nervously.

"Yeah... I was, uh, on a trip with my father." He said, glancing at Tatsuki. He didn't really feel sure about telling the truth in front of her because really now, if he just flat out said he'd been training what would some normal girl think in such a day and age. "Can I talk to you in the kitchen?"

Tatsuki shot him a suspicious look.

"She knows everything." Orihime said, let out a short, nervous laugh. The air was just so stiff feeling.

"Really?" He asked, turning to Tatsuki with an amused expression on his face. She propped her head up on her elbows and proceeded to glare at him. "Well, I was actually sort of curious as to what everyone was doing... I can't feel them."

Tatsuki delivered a quick, hard thump to the top of his head. Growling in a low tone as she did so. "I told you to watch it."

"No, it's okay. He's been gone, he doesn't know..." Orihime said, concentrating hard on her own hands that now lay in her lap. "Kurosaki-kun is... Everyone else is... dead."

"Orihime, wait!" Protested her best friend. Tatsuki understood how hard it would be to talk about for her; it hadn't even been a month. But Orihime shook her head.

"It was a hollow that killed them... it-it attacked while the Shinigami went back to Soul Society..."

Ishida pushed his glass up with his index finger, as his other hand suddenly found the teacup a very interesting object. _Dead?! 'All of them'? Who does that include? So is that it? Is this really the end? A hollow! How could just a hollow kill them?! That's insane! They can't really be dead! That's impossible! _His grip on his glass tightening every second until, finally, the fragile material gave way and it shattered under the pressure. "I'm sorry. Well, I- I should. Sorry for bothering you about this and for the, uh, the cup..."

Before they could object he left, he ran down the stairs, and farther down the street until the building was out of site. _Nooo!!! _His mind shouted. _This isn't happening! This can't be happening!!!_ He collapsed onto the sidewalk. Propping himself against the wall he stared out at the setting sun. He could feel it in the air around him, the usually energy he felt was gone, his nakama were gone...

**--------------------------------- (Six Months Later)----------------------------------**

The classroom was silent, the students had their faces buried in their text books. Ms. Ochita sighed, looking up at her class. It was so good to have it so quiet... her eyes passed over the class, picking out the several empty seats. It was shocking they hadn't been filled by now... they were just burdens adding to her guilt trip. After that day... Kurosaki hadn't returned... his group hadn't returned... She looked up at Tatsuki, who was, like everyone else, reading. That girl hadn't come back for a few days and when she did she had seemed... different. She absolutely refused to say anything about what happened, or about Kurosaki's group. Ms. Ochita could only assume they were one and the same.

Maybe... that day... if she had listened to Keigo... maybe she could've done something, maybe she could've changed what happened.

"Okay," She said from her desk. "When you've completed the passage please answer questions one through five and the critical thinking section on page 64."

-----------------------------------

_Dear Tatsuki,_

_It's always nice to hear from you! Sorry if it took kinda long to respond, I hadn't been back home for a while. I've missed you sooo much! I'm kind of surprised that I've been in the Soul Society as much as I have. It's so relieving, the war is finally over. We've all been working hard to fix it all up, it's sad how much was destroyed..._

_Even though I'm not a shinigami I've become part of the Shinigami Women's Association, and Unohana-taichou offered me a place in the fourth division! I don't know if I should take it though... I've been working at focusing efforts on reorganizing the Rukongai so that families can be reunited more easily and improve living situations._

_I'm hoping that maybe in the summer they'll let me bring you here, if you still want to come. I think you'd love it here! It looks like feudal times but they have computers and lots of other strange devices!!! _

_I'm not going to give up on him, even if I have to spend the rest of my life here. I know Kurosaki-kun would never have given up on me. He's here, he has to be. Even if it takes time for him to think about it, I now I'll see him eventually._

_-Orihime_

Orihime read it over and over again. She couldn't help but feel unsure... Annoyed, she crumbled the paper and tossed it into the trash can. How was she supposed to respond to Tatsuki's letter after being confronted about at least taking it a bit easier considering there was a possibility that it hadn't worked. Her first reaction was anger. But as Tatsuki had explained, she'd just been through a horrible, tragic war. Thousands of people had lost their lives, millions their home, and the government had fallen to pieces... This land was slowly being reconstructed through the tearful hard work of those affected. Orihime wanted to defend herself, explain how much these people needed her here, needed _this_... but she couldn't deny that every second she was out there she was looking for him. Searching through the crowds, peering down the alleys... she just couldn't stop. She was afraid to admit it, but she needed a break. Maybe it would be better if she just let herself forget...

Orihime stood up, and walked out of her little hut. These, hers along with a small group of others like it, were a temporary residence for shinigami reconstructing this portion of the Rukongai. There were little set ups like this all throughout the Soul Society. She turned the corner onto the busy, main street. Several passer-by's greeted her eagerly, she couldn't help but smile. The few shops that were up and running were simply... beautiful. They had been rebuilt and were no longer crumbling apart shacks. She watched children, happily running around their mother. This reuniting system had worked wonders so far, even though they'd only set it up with the 1st District people. She had special computers designed for this, all the members of the district were on the computers, along with their current residence's address. So when someone was looking for a particular family member or friend they could go to one of the several booths around their district and get the information from the Shinigami on duty there. She couldn't wait until all the districts were in the system, because if he was here she could find him. She still checked it constantly since anyone could take a trip here and get their information entered onto the computer.

Orihime stopped walking and tried to brush off all the dust that had gathered on her shihakushou from walking on the dirt road. A hand touched her shoulder, she swirled around, heart racing...

It was one of the shinigami on her team; Kanaye, a member of the sixth squad. He had short, brown hair and light blue eyes. He was always smiling and laughing but never really teased anyone. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." He apologized.

"No... no. It's fine." She said, straightening up. He placed a firm, but friendly hand on her shoulder.

"We're working on the fifth house down Saikoro Street, four grown-ups, one child." He told her, she nodded understandingly.

"Thanks, I'll be there in a moment. Go ahead without me... I feel like walking." Kanaye gave her a gentle rub on the head that seemed to make her feel calmer. He walked on past her. Orihime grabbed her head and closed her eyes. How come, even when she was talking to people or working with her group, she couldn't stop thinking about Ichigo? That guy had even showed obvious signs of liking her... but still. She continued down the busy street.

It began to feel like something was nagging at the back of her mind. The young human tried to ignore it but gradually she realized what it was. The sensation grew until it felt as if a cold breeze was wafting past her. However instead of the reassurance she thought she might feel it carried a sense of pain and misery. As any doubt that it was just her imagination faded, Orihime froze.

_Ba-bump, ba-bump... _She no longer heard the idle chatter of the souls walking by her. Only her heart, beating fast and loud, sounded over what she knew was coming. She dared not turn around, she couldn't, her body wouldn't let her.

"...Inoue..." A familiar voice muttered, an almost inaudible whisper. Her eyes flew open, it felt like her heart just stopped beating. _It's him! _She forced her self around. Heart shouting _'It's him! It's him!'_ Almost as if there was no one else around, she stared at the figure in front of her. His orange hair, his amber eyes, his tattered shihakushou... there was no doubt, it was him. But all that confidence, all that pride, all of the strength that he held in his composer and expression were gone. His eyes had an emptiness to them. Her heart began to hurt... had their choice really been the right one?

Not being able to stand still any longer, Orihime ran to him, wrapping him in a hug. Ichigo winced as she touched him.

"Don't touch me..." He said, his voice still super quiet, she hardly heard him. She could feel as his body began to tremble, his eyes shot wide open. He quickly pushed her off. "Don't touch me!"

Orihime tried not to feel hurt, he looked... _scared_. She wiped away the tears that had begun to drip down her cheeks, after all this time, he was finally here. She pulled off the black top of her shihakushou and handed it to him, realizing how tattered and ripped his was. She smiled kindly. "It's okay, Ichigo..."

Orihime reached out to comfort him, but stopped and pulled her hand back. He was so broken... his seams had come un-done. "We should go back, everyone will be so happy to see you."

He just looked her over with a dull expression. "...everyone's dead."

Orihime felt a bit stumped, not sure what she should say. "Not everyone...Your father and your sisters, Tatsuki and even Ishida, Urahara-san and Yoruichi-san... they've all been so worried about you..."

"_He_ killed them... I saw him kill them... they're all dead..." He muttered quietly to himself, his eyes on the ground. "Why'd I come? He killed her too... she's dead... she wouldn't be here if she wasn't dead... I killed her."

"I-I'm not dead, Kurosaki-kun... I'm here for the war." Orihime said slowly, unnerved by the way he was acting. Without thinking she placed her hand on his arm. His eyes shot up to hers, a mixture of anger and fright swirling though them.

"I said don't touch me." He growled. Orihime withdrew, feeling scared herself. He grabbed his face with his hands, which were trembling horribly. He murmured a few curses under his breath. "Sorry... Inoue... I shouldn't have come... I don't want hurt you too... I just... I just...I just wanted to apologize."

"He's gone, Kurosaki-kun."

"Don't fricken' screw with me!" He shouted, his voice shaking. People were stopping in the streets now to watch the scene, though the two center stage didn't really notice. Cold metal touched the side of his neck, a figure moved between the two, placing the tip of his Zanpaktou at the side of Ichigo's throat.

"Kanaye!" Orihime exclaimed. He stood protectively in front of her, glaring at Ichigo.

"Is this boy giving you trouble?" Kanaye asked in the sternest voice she'd ever heard him use.

Orihime stuttered for a moment, stumbling over her words. "He-he's good... I mean, he's not giving me any trouble or-or-or anything like that, at all! That's, ah, the person I've been looking for..."

Although his sword didn't budge an inch, Kanaye grinned widely. "Kurosaki Ichigo, really?! I finally get to meet you! Orihime's told me all about you! Now why don't you go back to where you came from, get yourself cleaned up, calm down, and we can have a nice little get together like how it should be done! I'm sure yelling that her in the middle of the street isn't how this should start out, besides... I don't really appreciate you doing that."

Orihime watched her orange haired friend, holding her breath as she waited for his reaction. Ichigo's hands fell back to his sides as he stared into Kanaye's eyes with what Orihime recognized as urging him on, encouraging his sword forward. Orihime felt herself trembling, she finally had him back! He was finally back! But he was so afraid of what had happened, afraid of himself. Now, because of her, he had to live with that for the seeming eternity he might live in the Soul Society, all because she was too afraid to let go.

"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry about everything..." Ichigo said to her and the turned back to the shinigami. "I shouldn't have tried to talk to her, I had no right. I should go..."

_When something's broken, you fix it..._

Orihime grabbed the hilt of Kanaye's Zanpaktou, taking it from him, she lowered it away from Ichigo. Her eyes were lowered to the ground as she stepped past him. Both arms outstretched. Despite his instant rejection, she hugged him tightly, burying her head in his chest. "We can fix it, it can be alright. He is gone, Kurosaki-kun. Urahara destroyed him..."

"D-destroyed? B-but that's impossible... that's ...that's..." He trailed of, his eyes gaining a sort of distant look to them as well.

"Inoue..." Kanaye said slowly, feeling a little uncomfortable. Not really sure what to do or say...

"If we work together... do you think we can fix it?" Orihime asked, closing her eyes. His body was so tense, she could feel it. _Maybe, with time it will heal._

"Fix it? Fix what!? They're still dead... I killed them, Inoue, how are you going to fix that?! You can't... it's over... they're dead. They're all dead... They're all dead... all because of me." Ichigo said, sort of going into a rant.

_But if you can't fix it..._

Orihime drew a deep breath. _I was selfish, I knew he wouldn't be normal again... but deep down I wanted that to be a lie so bad... I hung onto him, and hung onto him. But I'm really just hurting him. This isn't what he wanted, he wanted to stop a long time ago so he wouldn't hurt anyone else. So is it really fair to say it's his fault Renji and Sado were killed? It's ours, it's mine... I made a mistake again. _She squeezed her eyes as tight as they would go. _I even said so myself, but as soon as they were gone I denied it... because I felt so alone. Now what's left of him?_

"I should be the one saying 'I'm sorry'. If we make a mistake we should do our best to fix it, right?" She said, adjusting her hands behind his back.

_But if you can't fix it... all you can do is..._

"I'm so sorry for trying to do that to you." She said. Before he could think about a reaction he stopped, a sharp object poked into the area between his shoulder blades. A few tears escaped from her sealed eyes. "I love you, Ichigo." _...but I need to let go._

She shoved the sword up with all the force she could muster, running him through to the top of his head.

_throw it away... and learn how to live without it._

**THE END**

**Well, that's it! I enjoyed writing for you guys! Sadly, this is it for this one. I hope I will be able to work with you again in the near future with my next project "Revision of the Regrets". As for a sequel or epilouge I don't have any planned but... maybe. Bye!!!**


End file.
